Marriage at an early age for girls in rural areas

[Hulkster]

We all have discussed the various ways woman have been mistreated and not given freedom. But i also have had this thought for many years after my grandmother discussed with me about her friends' marriage at that time. Dunt all of you think that marriage at such an early age(usually after puberty ceremony) destroys the woman dreams of what she might want to do in her life? Should early marriage be opressed by the police in each village/district going strict over early marriages and the legal age increased to 21?
Please do give your views on this as this is a often overlooked topic.

[bingleguy]

Hmn .... interesting huh !
well those days ... avangala enga yosikka vittaanga ! appove theriyum polirukku, ivangala yosikka vitta nambalaye over take panniduvaanga nnu .... :lol: adhaan veetula pooti vechirundhaanga ! seekiram kalyanam pannitaanga ! so that they are confined to home ....

is early marriage biologically wrong ?

[Hulkster]

Not sure but i believe at such a young age women are highly prone to getting pregnant and thus the great risk of having quite alot of children. Perhaps if the government looked at this our population problem would be partly solved. (Partly solved because another part is about family planning)

[bingleguy]

Family Planning in India ... it is a distant dream ... but we can achieve it ... provided we understand what it really means .... here we are very much confined towards generations ...thats the reason !

[goodsense]

This seems to be a stuck thread because of the dilemmas that can be seen when one start to discuss.

Teenage girls from the villages are the most precious jewellry you can find. However, bias this might sound, I haven't seen any challenged that prove otherwise. City gilrs always think they are greater/superior, just because hey are more exposed. I remember how inferior I use to feel when the city gilrs come to visit fmaily in the villages, but later appreciated the values of a village girl. No matter what greatness she rises to, you can find humility and all the good qualities in her even when the waters are a bit rough.

Most men looking for good wives want to marry these kind of females from the villages. Such men are usually uneducated themselves and just as innocent. The educated ones, would prefer their wives from the villages to have some sort of formal education.

A teenage girl from a village environment would always have difficulties moving away from the expectations of those in her village environment. Some kind of suprort is definitely necessary to encourage and help her in moving away from traditional expectations and the way she was conditioned to think - start a family at an early age. And the community/people around her need to know that such education would not necessarily make her lose her values. This brings me to the point of village values and customs verses values and customs of the city girl likely to be educated. Is something really given up to get something and how much is it worth it?

I wanted to reply to this since last night, but was too tired an a bit down and still tired tonight. So if I don't make sense, excuse me. I will continue next time.

[Hulkster]

Since villagers generally focus on farming and other menial jobs and they usually do not focus on educating their children through books, young girls and to a certain extent boys are uneducated in villages. There is no interference with the values and customs except that they fear education might spoil their child to become modern or even ditch their families...as for girls because of the way they are valued in villages..they are to a certain extent barred from education.

To prove the villagers that education does not spoil them, an educated girl has to prove that she can also be simple and still the same even if she goes foreign for education...i believe the perception of city girls behaviour puts them off the topic of educating their girls.

[bingleguy]

kudos goodsense ... u do make sense ... u ve brought out a fact which keeps lingering in many ppl s minds !

I assume u had been to some villages, probably ur grand parent's place !

I would like to re-iterate this by pointing out some probs which even village girls face ! Nowadays, villages too are getting affected coz of media ! they watch all funny things shown in different channels ... earlier this was the only stuff which kept them a little away from absurd things ! but now everything is at their doorstep !

The only good thing now(which may change in the future) is that the girls in villages are mature enough to think which might suit them ... what other girls in the city think is "Let me try it on me, i may look good this way .... " (am just generalizing the feel) Experimenting is what they are into - the city type !

But village girls knew they are in a very closely monitored environment, whatever happens, whatever mistake they do...will easily be visible throughout the village ... faster than CNN or BBC ! believe me ! so they are careful in doin things ...they just dont experiment .. coz they are in a closed watched circuit !

[Hulkster]

BG..neenga solluruthu paartha CIA style security Villages leh nadukuthu mathiri irukku..:D....like goodsense madam pointed out...its the villages fear that binds this girls to obscurity....perhaps if the villagers were more broad minded the girls can be given a chance to prove themselves.

[bingleguy]

:lol:

[bingleguy]

Hulk rename the topic yaar ... countryside shld be visible to shower in proper points ;-) idam pathalanna andha residing word yeduthuttu update pannunga !

[Hulkster]

Topic ellam edit penna mudiyaathu pa...post mettum thaan.

[bingleguy]

hey dude ... why not ... just go n edit the first post ... n change its subject ... that first post subject is the topic yaar ! u can change it !

[rajraj]

Hulkster: Call it 'Marriage at an early age for girls in rural areas' !:)

But, it is not really true these days in all areas. Girls in villages go to college and get married after they finish. The parents even send them away to stay in hostels and study.
I am sure there are still some areas which have not progressed well.

[Hulkster]

Yeah slowly the villages are coming out of their shell...but theres still a disturbing trend in certain areas of marrying them off young and i have had some maids who told me they were married at 16, so i believe it is still quite widespread there......shall we enforce a law upon all villages that stress that marriages can only be done at 21 and maybe also stress that education till 12th standard is needed for every indian citizen...or like goodsense pointed out that we need to educate the villages that education does not spoil the values and morals of the village girls?

[bingleguy]

Bulls eye Hulk .. Thanks for the suggested topic raj

well true raj .. nowadays things are changing .. but the very mentality of the rural girls will take its own course of time to change ... though they are in a city, they will behave the same way as how they were behaving in their home ! they dont go for partying, roam on streets just like that ... n many other things ...

Hulk ... education on marriages have been done by many educational institutions along with the help of service minded doctors in many remote villages ... sometimes it so happens that they done take it ... some ppl give importance...

i guess K.Bhagyaraj has talked about this in some movie ... old one i guess ... a doctor lady comes to the rural area n she is more misunderstood by the ppl there !

[Hulkster]

K Bhagyaraj movies usually reflected on marriages and life affairs in villages interlaced with a brilliant and funny screenplay.....but im actually looking at early marriage as a hindrance as some of my maids told me they wanted to study english literature but were not able to due to their parents wanting them to marry as soon as they reached puberty.

This is where i want more viewpoints...maybe a bit more analysis from the hubbers who might have experienced early marriages or have such friends so that i can see how much of a hindrance it is.

It is possible that studying can go beyond marriage but due to them bearing children at a young age and their dreams oppressed(if the husbands insist on being the sole breadwinners) their lives become too limited. A severe lack of planning their life as married couples also make it hard for these village women.

[bingleguy]

unga kitta vandhu en idha sonnanga :roll: sorry hulk just kidding ! dont mind it ok ....

city la ppl there are many ppl whom i know continue their studies even after marriage ... even my own classmates i know .... but that i would nt call as early marr .. cos they were married only when they were doing PG ....

after puberty marriage ... is basically coz of fear that the girl might not accept ! coz some places maama ponnu athai paiyan kalyaanam pannanumnnu decide panni .. before she could even think ... kalyanam panni vechuduvaanga !

[Hulkster]

:lol:...athu ellam unnum ellei pa...naan indian life pathi visarikkum bothu avanga sonaanga...oru velai yennai paarka counsellor mathiri irunthicho?..

Yeah that too...i wonder why these fellas cant wait till atleast till she has some good formal education before marrying off....this is where we need to think of educating them...maaman paiyana athai paiyananu...unnum konjam nerathilae pakkathu veetu pangajam paiyanum pathi yosanai pennuvaanga...:banghead:

[bingleguy]

idhukku naan reply panninene enga kaanaama pochu ? :roll:

[Hulkster]

Paravalae onnuru murai reply pennunga pa

[bingleguy]

adhu dhaane nyaabagam illa ;-) :roll:

[Hulkster]

Kilichinchi krishna giri

[bingleguy]

hehhehe

[goodsense]

BG wrote: "I assume u had been to some villages, probably ur grand parent's place ! "

http://ormila.canadianwebs.com/Ormila-Bhoopaul2.htm

I think you missed by signature page which shows that this very woman is a village girl. To what extent? Well to start with my navel string was burried in this village :lol: and I lived there for 10 consecutive years. During one summer holiday, I was sent by my mother to meet my aunt who was working in the city. After the one month holiday, my aunt asked me if I want to stay and tranfer school and I said yes. We were living with another aunt and two uncles (their brothers). No doubt after that one month I realized it was a better life in the city where I was going to live and study for two years.

My younger uncle, I could never forget as long as I live. He spent all his freetime with me behind the books to ensure I would make it at entrance exam to secondary school. He would spend his money on work books and give me separate assignments in addition to that I had from school. Even before this time when he was in the vilage with us, when my place in class moved from first to third, he would say why not first or second.

After making it to highschool, unfortunately, they were all moving abroad. sadly, I was sent back to the village, did not evenr each puberty yet. It was horrible, but not for long. I followed some of them to Canada. So this is how I escaped the full village life.

Looking back at it all, especially my visit there a few months ago. I pity the children and the women. The women are so aged and burdended with many children and you can stil see a certain degree of innocence of those women limited to harsh living...Very few seems well off, but none went pass high school and those who did went to highschool, were few.

I think it depends on the family. Although most parents and gransparents came from farming background, a few were able to afford education for their children and they believed in it. My aunts were good example, one made it with seven distinction first time at CGE and had scholarship to the university of Guyna and the other went into teaching after highschool and then to England where she did nursing and this was late 60s early 70s. They had no elder brother or relatives either for any kind of protection and they have also been quite successful in later life with even higher education than mentioned - they continued abroad. So I was always in a studious environment with my ants and uncles, but i think if I had no time out of that village in those tow years, I would have been like most people there in that village - especially be female and the eldest of many boys.

It hard to break away from such a society. One lady had even come to see my mother about taking me out of school, saying girls should not go to school, but my mother ignored her, but I still had all kinds of pressures at home.

And BG, you are damn right, village girls are closely watched. The minute you miss, there is a message at home for your parents watiting for when you arrive :(

The pressures in the home is one thing, other kinds of abuse of village girls is another and there is no escape root for them. Worse yet, if they are not virgin on their wedding night, they will be beaten and sent bck to their parents :oops: to live in shame forthe rest of their lives. Many of these kinds became maids and domestic servants in homes of people to earn a little living for themselves while subjected to other kinds of abuse :evil: . If they stay with the husband, they will be beaten for years and if they leave, their parents would sent them back to the abusive husbands. They are sent back because the parents can't bear the shame and such women have no chance of re-marrying. She becomes a social outcast. :evil: :evil: Having had the chance to see both sides of the coin, my heart goes out to those women and I hope to help them in some way. :wink:

And BG, you are so right about the village girl when she is out of the viilage.

The village can also be a place of peace and nice rest where you can think. When I was there a few months back, I found it so quiet. Its amazing. If it was safe country and you have a nice home there, why not go for a few months and get away from here. I felt mellowed out walking through it which I never experienced before, perhaps it's different when you go for a short time as oppose to living there.

[bingleguy]

:clap: Goodsense ...

i seriously didnt know ur bground !

Abuse on gurlz is not acceptable..... i appreciate ur concern for these ppl ! as ppl in city wat could be our part in fighting this crime !

[goodsense]

Seriously, I think those girls need some help. They can't fight a family and their village community on their own and they shouldn't have to fight. These girls are seriously trapped.

[goodsense]

And those illiterate husbands don't even bother to consider how that girl have lost her virginity - like considering whether it was her fault or not. I know one girl had her nose slit by her husband. In the end they left but she couldn't get another guy. She ended up with Tom to Dick to Harry..... And there is no police to complain to......

I have seen decent men trying to even cover for their wives fault in such instances when she is wrong, but not all women are lucky, the ones who deserve the support most of all.

[Hulkster]

Wow goodsense....it reflects upon ages of scrutiny and tolerance of women to abuse by society and their husbands...it is of this that i hope to make a point to indians after my maids related the same experiences....hopefully people understand the consequences and troubles this women go through when they get married early and also of the way they are treated in the society...First of all we need to educate the society not through speeches but through examples...we need to also show them the pain that happens to girls due to this..then maybe such villages wunt be so hard on girls

Do you people have any suggestions on how we can do this?...enlightment is needed fast for such socieities on the atrocities forced upon women.

[Hulkster]

In Pakistan women are treated like vermin...and that itself is a polite description of how they are treated...in fact you can safely say that they are not allowed to do alot of things...education restricted..clothes restriction...relationship restriction...they get married early..and are watched very closely before and after marriage.

I believe if a girl has a relationship with a boy, she is stoned to death or even beheaded in afghanistan and if the girl is raped..violated(even if it is not her fault)..she has to be killed to protect the family's honour..this is abit outside the topic but since goodsense madam put those views..i might as well tell you guys of this as well.

It is very sad to hear women still cant express themselves freely in third world countries.

[goodsense]

Hulkster wrote:

"Do you people have any suggestions on how we can do this?...enlightment is needed fast for such socieities on the atrocities forced upon women."

I didn't want to reveal this as yet, but since you ask, I will. I am a member of the women's committee at the Vishnu Mandir here in Richmondhill, Ontario. We are having a meeting in a few days. The women are all Indian and from different countries. I have in mind to raise this issue alongside that about the children. Dr. B. Doobay, the head of the temple will be present, the only male I am told. It would be nice to have some men like you at the meeting Hulkster. And I am a bit perterb that we are not getting much response on this topic and discussion so far. What does this mean? :evil:

[Lambretta]

Even I dont like the idea of early marriage for girls (or boys altho tats now not so in their case).....sum frind once told me tat its best to marry a girl who's still in her late teens, like 18-19...!
But I simply dont like the idea......not only bcos of the suppressive nature it has but IMO tats is still considered as the age for studies/carefree attitude, so girls wudnt be mentally/emotionally mature as yet to take on the transformation of a wife/DIL & thereafter mother! They wud be by & large unprepared for this new role.....& they hav the chance to prepare for it only b4 they enter wedlock as they cant go back to their mothers' care after tat....so I feel the min. age shud be 22-23...altho I wud think it more ideal to marry sumone a little older than tat....like, 24-25....:)
My mother was 24 (& my father 25) wen they got married......her father wanted to hav her married off much b4 like, wen she was 20+....but she vehemtently fought against it, bcos she was still doing her MBBS then, plus she was against the idea of early marriage for girls....

[bingleguy]

We talk well ! but ultimately it boils down to what we actually do !

[Hulkster]

Lamby unga amma vittu society leh speech kodukka sollu pa...approm thaan konjam buthiyaavethu varettum...ellarum sernthu pesuvom.

[Hulkster]

Hulkster wrote:

"Do you people have any suggestions on how we can do this?...enlightment is needed fast for such socieities on the atrocities forced upon women."

I didn't want to reveal this as yet, but since you ask, I will. I am a member of the women's committee at the Vishnu Mandir here in Richmondhill, Ontario. We are having a meeting in a few days. The women are all Indian and from different countries. I have in mind to raise this issue alongside that about the children. Dr. B. Doobay, the head of the temple will be present, the only male I am told. It would be nice to have some men like you at the meeting Hulkster. And I am a bit perterb that we are not getting much response on this topic and discussion so far. What does this mean? :evil:

Well i cant fly to Canada suddenly..but i am thinking of joining UNICEF when i grow up and fight against this atrocities...possibly i will also try to work along with organisations like that of yours.

[bingleguy]

:clap: guys for ur efforts !

[goodsense]

Just before I go to bed, thought I share this since it came to mind thinkng about this topic and what we have been discussing here.
When I left the village for the first time at age ten, we had to take the boat to cross the Essequibo river. I remember saying to the lady taking me to the city (who was in the boat with me), "how come land, water land again"?.

I wouldn't be surprised, for many women leaving the village for the first time in their 30s, 40s or even 50s for the city, might ask the same question. Many of them never went to the city all their lives. It's sounds funny, but it's sad too :(

[goodsense]

"....possibly i will also try to work along with organisations like that of yours."

Good going Hulkster. There is need for more like you. And I think the right teachings has to start at home. People should train their sons before marriage how to treat (in the circumstances)and respect women, not only what to expect :wink: Moreover, how to treat a sister equally and fairly. I am saying this because when it comes to education, the sons are given priority and sometimes even at the expense of their sisters.

A man who makes a good brother and a sons is likely to be a good husband and vice versa. May be I am digressing a bit here, but I think it's related.

[bingleguy]

goodsense ... i didnt get u ! :roll: sorry !

[goodsense]

I said so much in my last two posts. Which part is unclear? Or is the sign that I should get to bed. It's after 2.am here, didn't realize it and I have an important appointment today which I must prepare for.

[aiwa]

There is one guy in my class ....his mom got married when she was 13 and he was around the same year ...maybe when his mom was 14 ....


when he was 16 his mom just entered her 30's

[Hulkster]

aiwa...thats a probable case due to girls being highly prone to pregnancy after the age of 12 -13.....My mum gently reminded me everytime to treat my wife well and never torture her..I am actually proud of her as it is becasue of her i have deep respect for women.

[Lambretta]

Lamby unga amma vittu society leh speech kodukka sollu pa...approm thaan konjam buthiyaavethu varettum...ellarum sernthu pesuvom.
:D I wish hulk.....aana eng-amma ku vanthu stage fear konjum adhikum! :oops:

Oh, and :thumbsup: to ur mother as well, Hulk! :D

[Hulkster]

Appadiya..:oops:...paravalae lamby..naan neenga BG goodsense SP ellarum poi pesinum naana thirunthiduvaanga..:D

[Lambretta]

Appadiya..:oops:...paravalae lamby..naan neenga BG goodsense SP ellarum poi pesinum naana thirunthiduvaanga..:D
If only tat was possible~! :D :(

[dsath]

In good old days, life expectancy was very less, only 35 or 45. So to keep the generation going it was sensible to reproduce as early as possible. This not only applied to women, but also men.
With medical advances, lifestyles and life expectancy has also increased. So there is no requirement to reproduce as early as possible. All development positive or negative takes more time to filter into villages and so the old ways are still practised.
With education and time, such things will surely stop............

[Hulkster]

Dsath good point :clap:....but this is where we need toe ducate the public of the medical growth in india and the probable problems india will face due to huge population....but that will only solve one problem as there are other issues surrounding why girls get married early as Lamby,goodsense madam and BG,aiwa all have pointed out

[crazy]

i suggest girl or boy should be married after 25, b'coz they will be more matured then(u might find some ppl unmature at 25 also).

[Hulkster]

yemma crazy raasaathi....maturity has nothing to do with someones age...it rather depends on one acceptance of truth and mistakes surrounding them and their life.....what do you think of girls getting married early..especially the troubles they might face?

[crazy]

yemma crazy raasaathi....maturity has nothing to do with someones age...it rather depends on one acceptance of truth and mistakes surrounding them and their life.....what do you think of girls getting married early..especially the troubles they might face?

hulk raasa iam totally against early marriages!(if thats what ur ques?!"

[Arthi]

i suggest girl or boy should be married after 25, b'coz they will be more matured then(u might find some ppl unmature at 25 also).

I feel matured does not come with you age.

[Hulkster]

Partly and also post about the troubles they face if they do such marriages....i need views so that i can see how we all see such marriages(this topic also slightly deviates on the troubles faced by women in doing such marriages so i welcome views on women too)

[Fire111999]

ok, in my experience i only know of girls getting married when they are more than 21 years, so i can't really say anything abt early marriages (as in before 21 yrs)

but i'd like to say that it is good to marry early (as in b/w 21 and 28 yrs) cos it's better to have children during these years. if it's later than 28yrs there might be problems having children. and also, if you have children early (as in when the girl is ard 25) then you wouldn't be too old by the time your kids grow up. so u can retire early cos ur kids will be old enuf to take over the responsibilities.

ok, i'm starting to not make any sense to myself! i shouldn't try to do too many things at the same time!

[goodsense]

BG,

I guess I may have confused you when I started to list of factors that can get compounded which the village girl marrying at an early age can face. A girl in the city may face some similar problems, but can find an escape root much easier. She doesn't always have to conform, but what choice does the village girl have?

I know village girls in big families and life is real hell if she has lots of brothers, whether they are young or old. The boys are not under so much pressure as the girls are. The girls have to cook, keep he home and even wash the dirty clothes of the brothers while these brothers are spending time in school getting educated or socializing with friends - hang out which girls in the villages are not allowed to do. Their place is in he home and constantly on her toes with domestic chores from dawn to dusk and for some of them, they start from age 10 with such responsibilities. I have seen them gathering woods for fire, start cooking and such things at that age. It is this kind of pressure that causes most girls to either commits suicide or elopes. When the girl elopes, she is branded as bad character and brought shame to the family. During her attempt to elope for these reasons, she ends up ... with the boy prior to marriage and the eloping may not always be successful. Sometimes, she is caught and brought back home, meanwhile no one knows what happened. The if she is forced to marry someone else, there goes even more trouble of being branded further and left in shame in the entire village, cause once you get sent back by the groom or and his family, the entire village knows why. So even if you escape abuse and torment by the groom and his family, you certainly wouldn't in your own village. Even your own family members will start to torment you out of ignorance. All they will focus on is the money they spent for the wedding and the shame you brought on them, not how it was caused etc. in defending you or themselves amongst village members.

The reality is, there is no good logic in villages and you have a hell of a hard time convincing such people of anything and to them they are right about everything.

I know one girl who escaped from pressures at home and ended up this way. I saw her when I was at home and reminded her of what she went through. She was surprised I remember. After the fact, she was even publicly beaten by her own father around a set of young men in broad day light at the corner of the road. I heard people saying even her underclothes were showing while she was beaten. That is one girl I have allot of sympathy for. I know she is absolutely decent. I know another girl who was black and blued by her father for similar reasons. These were all young teenagers.

Most of them never had the chance to leave a village all their lives and if they do at later ages, they are just as surprised as a person younger who made the same discoveries with an age gap of some 20 and 30 years.

[goodsense]

I know one beautiful teenage girl got married to one old ugly man and it didn't work out and she was blamed. This ugly old giy came and propsoed claiming he has money and will soon be going abroad. The gullible village family belived. After the marriage, she had no bed to sleep on, no food and had to come and take things from her parents. A few months later, she left him and filed a divorce. This is the first divorce case I know of in the country and from a village girl. The father tormented her seeing her now as a burden came back on him after all the money spent on the marriage.

Before the offer, her position wasn't speculated incase the marriage did not work out. This girl was also taken out of school by the same father when she reached puberty.

[goodsense]

What we are seeing here Hulkster, is that the people in the rurual including the family, imposes on the teenage girl, what she should be, her place in the home and her purpose in life. She is pepared for this at a very early age. These women are not seen as individuals in their own right i.e to decide who they want to be and what they want out of life. They are trapped long before they can think for themselves, then they don't have the knowledge available to them to help them to think. And when her marriage fails, she is left to bear the brunts of it all with a hopeless future :(

Sadly, the people who benefit from it all, are the people who would try to keep it the way it is :wink: :evil:

[Hulkster]

Classic case of women oppression...this is what we will be needing to fight towards when speak for women. Its no use feeling sorry for them as only sympathy is going around.that is why i have decided to join such organisations in hope that i can educate such villages about the troubles they cause to women and at the same time encourage women there to speak up.

[phil]

i suggest girl or boy should be married after 25, b'coz they will be more matured then(u might find some ppl unmature at 25 also).

Thinking of the west, people marry at around age 25, but have girl friends or boyfriends and have sex even before age 17. Even in india this trend is beginning to grow. Potentially a new thread, need someone to implement the idea

[bingleguy]

<digr>
Ys ... Phil ... u r right ! This thing has started to grow in India ! well, we dont learn their architecture, we dont learn their advancement, we dont learn their education, we dont learn their achievements ! But we definitely learn their dressing, we learn their custom(selected naughty customs) and to add we learn goin against nature !

Hahahahha poor ppl they come to us to learn Yoga, they come to us to learn our customs n they are amazed at our customs, they come to learn spirituality from us, they come to learn what all GOOD we have !

The world is such !
</digr>

[Lambretta]

Bitter but true, BG! :( :cry:

[bingleguy]

we do say tis bitter ! but we do it .... why ?

[Lambretta]

we do say tis bitter ! but we do it .... why ?
No BG, surely those of us who say its bitter r not the ones who do it......?

[bingleguy]

Ya, i agree ! but have we ever tried to highlight this to somebody ? have we ever tried to stop this ... NOPE ... can we give any reasons ?

[Lambretta]

Ya, i agree ! but have we ever tried to highlight this to somebody ? have we ever tried to stop this ... NOPE ... can we give any reasons ?
BG, I think the same as u.....I've often felt like speaking out & trying to stop this.....times wen I felt suffocated living in the way our society has turned out.....but I've realised tat as a solitary & Ordinary xyz individual, I or u cant do nething towards the entire society....even if we did, it'd take ages b4 we r even noticed!
This is like, a current flowing very strongly in one direction....at this stage, we cannot as yet stop the flow.....at the most we can save ourselves by stayng away from the current on the bank & not getting swept away w/ it.....but I guess after those who've enjoyed being drawn into this current meet their doom in the final fall, our society wud learn its lesson!

[bingleguy]

It hasnt took ages for this to come ! isnt it ? why shld it take ages to make ppl understand !?

[bingleguy]

Well at one point ... if the stream is not worth to be joined we can always stay away from it ! but the fact is as good individuals ... nobody can watch their own stream getting dirty ... wont we atleast try to stop the mixing dirt ?

[goodsense]

Well Hulkster, some people see this kind of women's oppression positively and label it as 'tradition". Because it's seen as tradition in a positive way, it is perpetuated with a blind eye to the "flaws" and "injustice" it is constituted by.

What is tradition? It's a mode of thought or behavior followed by a people continuously from generation to generation; a custom or usage.

********

Clearly, tradition is not religion, and in the sense of our discussion, it's a set of practices set out by one generation, followed by, or forcely followed by another without the generation or part of the generation following it in this manner, being "give the opportunity" to decide if they want to follow and whether it's in their interest to do so.

*******
I am not taking this position because I am female and originated from a village, I am doing so in the interest of justice and this is why I hope to become a judge one day and I hope it would be sooner than later :wink:

[Hulkster]

As for sex, we all know sex is actually meant to create children and as certain people see it,pleasure but it is only meant for a husband and wife.However westerners saw sex as a healthy way of living and also saw it like some sort of normal activity to be done between anybody whom you date...:banghead:...because of this, the beauty of sex being done first time between the husband and wife was lost and not only that, it was also made to look disgusting.

Naalu sevurukku nadukkura vishayam eppo ella yedathilum irukku.

Let me bring forward a point that the girl/boy you sleep with is automatically your wife/husband. Marriage is not only by just thaali and ceremonies...once you have sex with a girl/boy your also sort of married to that person. Only correct values instilled into children at young can change this catastrophe.

[Hulkster]

when i said this catastrophe i meant the way sex is being abused now by westerners.

[Hulkster]

Thats true...of course it is their way of practising as no religion discusses any sort of oppression over women....this can only change the faster we get to these societies and show them first hand the effects of such practices.

[crazy]

Let me bring forward a point that the girl/boy you sleep with is automatically your wife/husband. Marriage is not only by just thaali and ceremonies...once you have sex with a girl/boy your also sort of married to that person. Only correct values instilled into children at young can change this catastrophe.

yes i agree, but what if u got raped? is he/she ur husband/wife forever!
i guees there is always an exception!or think if u made a mistake, does it mean that u have to live with him/her or considering him/her as ur wife/husband forever?

[Hulkster]

Raped also means sex...so the same rule applies...of course they can make a decision if they want to be husband and wife...but although some girls might not want marriage...to a girl who values her dignity and honour she will marry the person as although violated...he has seen her body and touched her.

Athu enna forever?....wife and husband cannot be forever meh?..priyamanavalae mathiri contract agreement ellam irukka?..:D

[crazy]

Raped also means sex...so the same rule applies...of course they can make a decision if they want to be husband and wife...but although some girls might not want marriage...to a girl who values her dignity and honour she will marry the person as although violated...he has seen her body and touched her.
Athu enna forever?....wife and husband cannot be forever meh?..priyamanavalae mathiri contract agreement ellam irukka?..:D

sex is not need/ neither bodies! its should be only done/practise with purpose( :?: ). if someone violated it doesnt necessarily means that she has to marry him! she cant live or marry someone who violated her. she can only live with the one who loves her/care for her.
u cant possibly have sex without love/passion! the sex without love and passion is what i call prostitution!

[Hulkster]

:D...im not saying that woman love those who they marry whether its a person who has violated them or not...i have seen cases of where the girl despite not loving the person lived for the sake of him having touched her body...athukaaga marriage is a must nu sollulae...i just mean as an example and of course girls usually do not love or care for people who violate them although there have been cases where the rape was a hasty act and the person actually reformed. Of course gang rapes...rapes done in the form of seriously destroying the person ,marriage is out of question.

As for sex...athu unnum practice or done with purpose ellei...the hormones and our romantic stimulations in our mind naturally produces lust for each other which then slowly results in sex. It is a natural feeling in humans and part and parcel of human life.

And prostitution is rape in a way as the woman certainly does not really ask for sex..it is just she has to do this to save her family or something...love has nothing to do with sex...the arousal of sex is more towards the lust that ensues in the mind.

Yemma crazy raasathi...unga ideologies seem to be abit wild and more of your own perception...tappu nu sollulae..its a small misconception...poga poga you will realise the reaons of why such things happen.

[crazy]

what do trying to say, that just b'coz ur hormones kick create lust and then u have have sex!
sex i dont care, what i was saying is it should be done with love or purpose, as u say creation of lust :roll:
in which do my ideologies seem wild and more with my own perception?
and what do u want me to know? why things happens?what?

[Fire111999]

Raped also means sex...so the same rule applies...of course they can make a decision if they want to be husband and wife...but although some girls might not want marriage...to a girl who values her dignity and honour she will marry the person as although violated...he has seen her body and touched her.
Athu enna forever?....wife and husband cannot be forever meh?..priyamanavalae mathiri contract agreement ellam irukka?..:D

what nonsense? cos the girl values (what?) her dignity and honour, she has to marry some idiotic senseless guy who raped her. unga puthi yen ipdi poguthu. if the girl really values her dignity and honour, she'll not tolerate being married to such a cheap person. rather treat the incident as a bad dream and get on with her life. itha vittutu, enna madathanam!

[Fire111999]

As for sex...athu unnum practice or done with purpose ellei...the hormones and our romantic stimulations in our mind naturally produces lust for each other which then slowly results in sex. It is a natural feeling in humans and part and parcel of human life.

excuuusse meee! just cos u feel lust for someone, u shouldn't have sex with that person! u have to love the person!

[bingleguy]

enna nadakkudhu inga :shock:

[Fire111999]

what do trying to say, that just b'coz ur hormones kick create lust and then u have have sex!
sex i dont care, what i was saying is it should be done with love or purpose, as u say creation of lust :roll:

i agree with u totally!

[crazy]

fire i said that just before .read that!
if i say so, that seems so wild for others!

[Fire111999]

enna nadakkudhu inga :shock:

u don;t want to know vasanth. hulk is saying all sorts of crazy thing! like the girl who gets raped will get married to the guy who raped her if she values her dignity and honour. what rubbish!

[crazy]

what do trying to say, that just b'coz ur hormones kick create lust and then u have have sex!
sex i dont care, what i was saying is it should be done with love or purpose, as u say creation of lust :roll:

i agree with u totally!

thank god
someone agrees with me!

[bingleguy]

Creation of LUST obviously needs LOVE in it ! if not that is meaningless !

LUST without permission ! thats really goin against the will of the girl ... so thats not real !

[Hulkster]

Aiyoyoyo since i have seen and conversed with such victims before naan appadi post pennaen..just as an example...neruppu neenga yennodeiya kadeisi post padichaengela?.

Yemma crazy raasathi....i was describing how sex is aroused in a person..and lust is totally different from love...love is more of the feelings and heart..its actual purpose is to create children...but it is not necessarily always love...there have been cases where sex was used just to create children and there was no relationship between both people.

Unga ideologies seem wild abit cause they seem to come from a single individual's point of view...i see mine from as in a general view...athaan...naan thaan sonneinae it is not wrong..it is just a small misconception.

(Note: Please read my posts carefully and slowly...intha mathiri straight conclusionsku vanthaenge serupaalae vanthu adippaen ungalai ellam thedi...:evil: :lol:)

[crazy]

bingley iavlo neram enga irundheenga?
iam glad u and fire came! i was arguing lonely with hulk!

[bingleguy]

enna nadakkudhu inga :shock:

u don;t want to know vasanth. hulk is saying all sorts of crazy thing! like the girl who gets raped will get married to the guy who raped her if she values her dignity and honour. what rubbish!


No no no Fire ... i shall try to interpret what he might be trying to say !

he meant values n dignity meaning that she doesnt want anybody else to see or touch her body ! that could be the reason he says !

if not ... then i stay with u guys !

[Hulkster]

ellei ellei...lust does not always have to lead to sex..im implying that it plays a major part in the arousal of sex...lust is there when you see and admire models for their beauty...and you see soft porn books or movies...that is also lust....love as i said is totally towards emotions and feelings..it comes due to the admiration of the person's character and care for you.

Its not lust without permission as lust is a individuals own natural feeling...permissionoda varathu ellei....what you mean is sex without permission and that is rape...which is of course violating a girl without her willingness.

[crazy]

Yemma crazy raasathi....i was describing how sex is aroused in a person..and lust is totally different from love...love is more of the feelings and heart..its actual purpose is to create children...but it is not necessarily always love...there have been cases where sex was used just to create children and there was no relationship between both people.

Unga ideologies seem wild abit cause they seem to come from a single individual's point of view...i see mine from as in a general view...athaan...naan thaan sonneinae it is not wrong..it is just a small misconception.

(Note: Please read my posts carefully and slowly...intha mathiri straight conclusionsku vanthaenge serupaalae vanthu adippaen ungalai ellam thedi...:evil: :lol:)

hulk it seems like u and i never fit for anythiing !
but try to see what i said, i believe sex need love and purpose! thats it! iam leaving!

[Hulkster]

enna nadakkudhu inga :shock:

u don;t want to know vasanth. hulk is saying all sorts of crazy thing! like the girl who gets raped will get married to the guy who raped her if she values her dignity and honour. what rubbish!


No no no Fire ... i shall try to interpret what he might be trying to say !

he meant values n dignity meaning that she doesnt want anybody else to see or touch her body ! that could be the reason he says !

if not ... then i stay with u guys !

Yeaps that was what i meant and fire...please read my next post after that...yemma slow and steadya padinga pa...intha mathiri adukka pudukka padikaathaenge...approm misunderstanding thaan varum...:D)

[Fire111999]

Yemma crazy raasathi....i was describing how sex is aroused in a person..and lust is totally different from love...love is more of the feelings and heart..its actual purpose is to create children...but it is not necessarily always love...there have been cases where sex was used just to create children and there was no relationship between both people.

(Note: Please read my posts carefully and slowly...intha mathiri straight conclusionsku vanthaenge serupaalae vanthu adippaen ungalai ellam thedi...:evil: :lol:)

only lust is not the way to go in sex. love is the most important ingredient. and when u talk of cases of sex just to create children, i don't see where lust comes in as well!

and for your last part, NOT FUNNY! :x

[Hulkster]

The main purpose of sex is to create children...its a form of reproduction...lust comes in wherever sex is...you cant have sex without lust....Naan thaan sollitaen leh...love is totally different topic from sex.

[bingleguy]

hey hey hulk n crazy .... cmon guys ... be cool !

Hulk ... dont put down those words ... it may not be sounding funny to ppl ... that too when u both are on opposite poles !

Crazy ... cool yaar .... chill out ! we all have different opinions ... lets not directly come to conclusions !

[Fire111999]

enna nadakkudhu inga :shock:

u don;t want to know vasanth. hulk is saying all sorts of crazy thing! like the girl who gets raped will get married to the guy who raped her if she values her dignity and honour. what rubbish!


No no no Fire ... i shall try to interpret what he might be trying to say !

he meant values n dignity meaning that she doesnt want anybody else to see or touch her body ! that could be the reason he says !

if not ... then i stay with u guys !

Yeaps that was what i meant and fire...please read my next post after that...yemma slow and steadya padinga pa...intha mathiri adukka pudukka padikaathaenge...approm misunderstanding thaan varum...:D)

of course any girl wil feel that only one guy must see or touch her body. but in the case of rape? that's y girls commit suicide when they're raped. but how would her dignity allow that she get married to that idiot? i think rather commit suicide than marry that idiot. if she can't forget that incident, stay single. there's more to life than marriage. but best is to treat it like a bad dream and get on with her life, get married to someone nice, etc.

[Hulkster]

Just a question out of the topic....Have you guys ever tried thinking when your alone of how sex comes about and what causes it?...Sometimes by thinking of such things we can get the solutions of how this happen and why this happen.

[Fire111999]

ellei ellei...lust does not always have to lead to sex..im implying that it plays a major part in the arousal of sex...lust is there when you see and admire models for their beauty...and you see soft porn books or movies...that is also lust....love as i said is totally towards emotions and feelings..it comes due to the admiration of the person's character and care for you.

Its not lust without permission as lust is a individuals own natural feeling...permissionoda varathu ellei....what you mean is sex without permission and that is rape...which is of course violating a girl without her willingness.

excuuse meeee!

and anyway, u're changing what u said. u started out with saying that sex has nothing to do with love and it was just hormones, etc. now u're shying from tt!

[bingleguy]

Hulk ... is she right ? is that wat u initially said ?

[Fire111999]

Just a question out of the topic....Have you guys ever tried thinking when your alone of how sex comes about and what causes it?...Sometimes by thinking of such things we can get the solutions of how this happen and why this happen.

hallo! if sex is just abt hormones, pple will be having sex with anybody and everybody left and right. and girls wouldn't feel that only one guy should touch them.

sex is a whole deal more abt love than abt lust!

[Hulkster]

enna nadakkudhu inga :shock:

u don;t want to know vasanth. hulk is saying all sorts of crazy thing! like the girl who gets raped will get married to the guy who raped her if she values her dignity and honour. what rubbish!


No no no Fire ... i shall try to interpret what he might be trying to say !

he meant values n dignity meaning that she doesnt want anybody else to see or touch her body ! that could be the reason he says !

if not ... then i stay with u guys !

Yeaps that was what i meant and fire...please read my next post after that...yemma slow and steadya padinga pa...intha mathiri adukka pudukka padikaathaenge...approm misunderstanding thaan varum...:D)

of course any girl wil feel that only one guy must see or touch her body. but in the case of rape? that's y girls commit suicide when they're raped. but how would her dignity allow that she get married to that idiot? i think rather commit suicide than marry that idiot. if she can't forget that incident, stay single. there's more to life than marriage. but best is to treat it like a bad dream and get on with her life, get married to someone nice, etc.

hmm....it seems your looking at rape as only one type....as i have mentioned...rapes done in the form of seriously causing hurt to the person...gangrapes...rapes cum murder are things the girl will never accept...but oru chinna advice...tappa ninaichikathaenge...please try to look from a general viewpoint as well...not all rapists are idiots...some rapists have mental illnesses that makes them have pleasure in seeing other people suffer...and there are some rapists who do it in haste although they are actually nice people...a rape can be a sudden hasty thought of a person regardless of whether he is good or not...naan thaan sonneinae...in certain cases the girl feels it is okay to marry the rapist if the rapist is actually a good person and she feels she can reform him...there are many different scenarios which can be seen from here....i do agree with the rest of your points though.

[bingleguy]

Sex s not just about Harmones hulk !

It needs the ingredient LOVE to be complete along with LUST !!

Reading P*RN books is just to get aroused and just LUST without any LOVE ...

I would say LOVE n LUST shld exist ... n shld not be an open thing !

[Fire111999]

love has nothing to do with sex...the arousal of sex is more towards the lust that ensues in the mind.
i think he said the same thing once before. but couldn't find it. too many posts.

[Lambretta]

hallo! if sex is just abt hormones, pple will be having sex with anybody and everybody left and right.
Sadly ther r many ppl. (inc. girls) who do tat....more now than b4 perhaps.....but of course, NOT EVERYBODY by ne means.....!

[bingleguy]

Hey dude ... nalla manushanga oru nimisham manasu madiri thappu panninalum ... avanga nalla manushanga dhaan nu solreenga ... ok !

But appadi oru manushanukku eppo venumnaa yaaraiyaavadhu paathaa andha aasai vandhuduchunnaa " appadinnu andha ponnu ninaikalaam illaya .. so appadi oruthanoda eppadi kudumbam nadatha mudiyum !?

I meant
"Hey dude, though a good man does a mistake due to some reason, they are good men is wat u said ... fine

but why shld not the girl think that "am man who has made a mistake once, may do the same with another person" she can think this and wish to stay away from him, though he is good !
So how will she run a family with him !

[Fire111999]

and there are some rapists who do it in haste although they are actually nice people

what????????? some rapists are actually nice pple!!!!!!!
yeah, i;m sure some murderers are real nice pple too!!!!!!

[Fire111999]

Sex s not just about Harmones hulk !

It needs the ingredient LOVE to be complete along with LUST !!

Reading P*RN books is just to get aroused and just LUST without any LOVE ...

I would say LOVE n LUST shld exist ... n shld not be an open thing !

thanks, vasanth. but could u translate ur other post to english? right now, i don't have the patience to make out the tamil! sorry!

[Hulkster]

Fire unga kitae eppo enna sonnein? see my posts slowly and carefully...i say hormones play a part in the arousal of sex...i was describing how sex is done and how it is aroused....of course we must have self control over lust when it comes.

As for the one about soft porn...i was saying that lust is a natural feeling that appears in everyone of us and explaining how it comes about...i was describing lust...lust is just a feeling...sex is the process or the action...and please read carefully that i was describing the process of how sex happens...like how they teach you in sex education.

Of course you will have sex with the person whom you love...but love does not interplay with sex as in the process when it happens...when sex happens it is just the work of your lust..hopefully this time you can see what i mean carefully.

[goodsense]

I think I know what Hulk was getting at. I know one girl under 16. She went to visit a family. They had a son who no good girl wouild want to marry. He has a bad reptation and is even called a strange name than his actual name. When the got the girl to the hosue, they locked them in a room, then called the police. The police then order that he marry her since she was under age. They got married and had a few childen. Don't know if the thoughts of that woman changed, now that she is matured and can reflect on how she got her husband. Surely at the tme, her and her family were thinking that they would have a hard time getting her a husband, cause the whole village knew about what happened.

I know another case involving the police and an underage girl, but at least those two people were in love and the girl's parents were only too happy to take the police order and get them married.

[Fire111999]

hallo! if sex is just abt hormones, pple will be having sex with anybody and everybody left and right.
Sadly ther r many ppl. (inc. girls) who do tat....more now than b4 perhaps.....but of course, NOT EVERYBODY by ne means.....!

just cos some pple do it doesn't make it right! and also, it doesn't proof that sex has nothing to do with love as well! love is very important in sex!

[Hulkster]

Hey dude ... nalla manushanga oru nimisham manasu madiri thappu panninalum ... avanga nalla manushanga dhaan nu solreenga ... ok !

But appadi oru manushanukku eppo venumnaa yaaraiyaavadhu paathaa andha aasai vandhuduchunnaa " appadinnu andha ponnu ninaikalaam illaya .. so appadi oruthanoda eppadi kudumbam nadatha mudiyum !?

Athukaaga thaan sonnein there are alot of scenarios that can arise from this...the scenario you gave is one such example...there is also another scenario that the person might be reformed if the girl is willing to forgive....yeppada..solliyae kanner vanthuthu...:D

[Fire111999]

Fire unga kitae eppo enna sonnein? see my posts slowly and carefully...i say hormones play a part in the arousal of sex...i was describing how sex is done and how it is aroused....of course we must have self control over lust when it comes.

As for the one about soft porn...i was saying that lust is a natural feeling that appears in everyone of us and explaining how it comes about...i was describing lust...lust is just a feeling...sex is the process or the action...and please read carefully that i was describing the process of how sex happens...like how they teach you in sex education.

Of course you will have sex with the person whom you love...but love does not interplay with sex as in the process when it happens...when sex happens it is just the work of your lust..hopefully this time you can see what i mean carefully.

if u see sex as just doing it, i've nothing to say to you!

[Fire111999]

Hey dude ... nalla manushanga oru nimisham manasu madiri thappu panninalum ... avanga nalla manushanga dhaan nu solreenga ... ok !

But appadi oru manushanukku eppo venumnaa yaaraiyaavadhu paathaa andha aasai vandhuduchunnaa " appadinnu andha ponnu ninaikalaam illaya .. so appadi oruthanoda eppadi kudumbam nadatha mudiyum !?

Athukaaga thaan sonnein there are alot of scenarios that can arise from this...the scenario you gave is one such example...there is also another scenario that the person might be reformed if the girl is willing to forgive....yeppada..solliyae kanner vanthuthu...:D

vasanth, r u still there? can u translate ur part at least? thank you!

[Hulkster]

and there are some rapists who do it in haste although they are actually nice people

what????????? some rapists are actually nice pple!!!!!!!
yeah, i;m sure some murderers are real nice pple too!!!!!!

Fire...even a good person can be forced to do anything bad according to circumstances...yethu yeppo nadukkum nu namakku theriyaathu...what im trying to say that there are people who were good and decent before such things happened.

[Hulkster]

Fire unga kitae eppo enna sonnein? see my posts slowly and carefully...i say hormones play a part in the arousal of sex...i was describing how sex is done and how it is aroused....of course we must have self control over lust when it comes.

As for the one about soft porn...i was saying that lust is a natural feeling that appears in everyone of us and explaining how it comes about...i was describing lust...lust is just a feeling...sex is the process or the action...and please read carefully that i was describing the process of how sex happens...like how they teach you in sex education.

Of course you will have sex with the person whom you love...but love does not interplay with sex as in the process when it happens...when sex happens it is just the work of your lust..hopefully this time you can see what i mean carefully.

if u see sex as just doing it, i've nothing to say to you!

Fire aiyoyoyoyo...did u get what i meant?...i was describing how sex comes as in the process...as in how it happens...im not describing..why people have sex...and the reasons...im describing the process...:D..aiyoyoyo solli puriya veikiruthu kullarae paathi aaisu poyidum

[Fire111999]

Hey dude ... nalla manushanga oru nimisham manasu madiri thappu panninalum ... avanga nalla manushanga dhaan nu solreenga ... ok !

But appadi oru manushanukku eppo venumnaa yaaraiyaavadhu paathaa andha aasai vandhuduchunnaa " appadinnu andha ponnu ninaikalaam illaya .. so appadi oruthanoda eppadi kudumbam nadatha mudiyum !?

Athukaaga thaan sonnein there are alot of scenarios that can arise from this...the scenario you gave is one such example...there is also another scenario that the person might be reformed if the girl is willing to forgive....yeppada..solliyae kanner vanthuthu...:D

ok. i still haven't read what vasanth said. but for ur part, i don't see where the girl's dignity and honour comes into the picture? why does she have to marry that idiotic guy who is actually a nice guy (is this possible???????) but decided to rape her (and in a rape the girl is protesting like mad and the guy's decision is not an instaneous bad decision, he has to overcome her, etc)?

[bingleguy]

FIRE .. i ve edited my post !

[Hulkster]

Goodsense madam...these are actually the scenarios i meant that can arise from such situations from rape...and there are alot of types...it just happened fire madam just misunderstood my point as just one scenario...:D

[Hulkster]

Hey dude ... nalla manushanga oru nimisham manasu madiri thappu panninalum ... avanga nalla manushanga dhaan nu solreenga ... ok !

But appadi oru manushanukku eppo venumnaa yaaraiyaavadhu paathaa andha aasai vandhuduchunnaa " appadinnu andha ponnu ninaikalaam illaya .. so appadi oruthanoda eppadi kudumbam nadatha mudiyum !?

Athukaaga thaan sonnein there are alot of scenarios that can arise from this...the scenario you gave is one such example...there is also another scenario that the person might be reformed if the girl is willing to forgive....yeppada..solliyae kanner vanthuthu...:D

ok. i still haven't read what vasanth said. but for ur part, i don't see where the girl's dignity and honour comes into the picture? why does she have to marry that idiotic guy who is actually a nice guy (is this possible???????) but decided to rape her (and in a rape the girl is protesting like mad and the guy's decision is not an instaneous bad decision, he has to overcome her, etc)?

I am not seeing she has to marry...she can choose to marry and to support that i quote a few examples where they have done that..and what you stated is a possible scenario that can arise...in that scenario of course she will not marry that person.

[Fire111999]

Fire unga kitae eppo enna sonnein? see my posts slowly and carefully...i say hormones play a part in the arousal of sex...i was describing how sex is done and how it is aroused....of course we must have self control over lust when it comes.

As for the one about soft porn...i was saying that lust is a natural feeling that appears in everyone of us and explaining how it comes about...i was describing lust...lust is just a feeling...sex is the process or the action...and please read carefully that i was describing the process of how sex happens...like how they teach you in sex education.

Of course you will have sex with the person whom you love...but love does not interplay with sex as in the process when it happens...when sex happens it is just the work of your lust..hopefully this time you can see what i mean carefully.

if u see sex as just doing it, i've nothing to say to you!

Fire aiyoyoyoyo...did u get what i meant?...i was describing how sex comes as in the process...as in how it happens...im not describing..why people have sex...and the reasons...im describing the process...:D..aiyoyoyo solli puriya veikiruthu kullarae paathi aaisu poyidum

enna? talking abt the sex process as in these hormones are involved. this chemical is reponsible for the male erection, etc etc. sex = penetration and possibly orgasms? when did we start talking in such biological terms?

we're talking abt sex as in the entire thing! between a man and a woman. not between 2 human beings of opposite sexes!

[bingleguy]

hey guys TIMEOUT TIMEOUT !

Lets stop here for a while ... cool !

[Fire111999]

FIRE .. i ve edited my post !

sorry sorry. thanks!

[Hulkster]

That was what i meant...but as in how it comes..like before we start having sex...our hormones are already working to induce lust which instils that feeling of sex in us...thats what i meant....and i said love doesnt play a part in the process of sex as in the process of how it is done..the lust the hormones...of course it is a very obvious fact that you must love the person to have sex with them.

[Fire111999]

I am not seeing she has to marry...she can choose to marry and to support that i quote a few examples where they have done that..and what you stated is a possible scenario that can arise...in that scenario of course she will not marry that person.

so u're talking back your words? i mean, u did say that a girl who values her dignity and honour will marry that guy, right? so do u admit that tt's crap?

[bingleguy]

Guys ... this is goin beyond control !

Wait .... wait !

[Hulkster]

Naan muthalirinthu coola thaan irunthaen pa...ellei na saithapettai keitha vaarthai vanthirukkum :D..it seems fire misunderstood what i meant totally and got abit agitated from her previous interpretation of my posts...there is a good thing in it as well...it proves my theory that no matter how knowledgeable a person is..when they are agitated or in a state of tension they can accidentally or willingly ignore the facts.

[Lambretta]

just cos some pple do it doesn't make it right! and also, it doesn't proof that sex has nothing to do with love as well! love is very important in sex!
Hmm.....seems to be a lot of misunderstandings in this thread today! :D
I certainly dont say it is right in ne way......was jus being ironic but looks likt it didnt make the right effect! :(
And yea of course Love is THE most important aspect in sex! :)

[bingleguy]

Now guys ... Just two line of what u wished to say .. each one of u would say ... n we shall continue from there ! just two lines of what u were saying !

[Fire111999]

That was what i meant...but as in how it comes..like before we start having sex...our hormones are already working to induce lust which instils that feeling of sex in us...thats what i meant....and i said love doesnt play a part in the process of sex as in the process of how it is done..the lust the hormones...of course it is a very obvious fact that you must love the person to have sex with them.

nalla malupreenga! but whatever, u agree that love is important in sex right? so that's fine!

[bingleguy]

read my previous post ... n start according to that !

[Hulkster]

I am not seeing she has to marry...she can choose to marry and to support that i quote a few examples where they have done that..and what you stated is a possible scenario that can arise...in that scenario of course she will not marry that person.

so u're talking back your words? i mean, u did say that a girl who values her dignity and honour will marry that guy, right? so do u admit that tt's crap?

fire naan thaan unga kitae sollitaenae...read the next post after that...i corrected what i actually meant by that...i accidentally forgot to post the scenarios due to me typing too fast....what i meant is that if a girl is someone who believes in marrying the person who touches her body whether it is willingly or unwilling done..she will marry the person...i forgot to post this which made you interpret my post like that.

[Fire111999]

Naan muthalirinthu coola thaan irunthaen pa...ellei na saithapettai keitha vaarthai vanthirukkum :D..it seems fire misunderstood what i meant totally and got abit agitated from her previous interpretation of my posts...there is a good thing in it as well...it proves my theory that no matter how knowledgeable a person is..when they are agitated or in a state of tension they can accidentally or willingly ignore the facts.

hallooooooo! don't just side track! crazy left cos of what u said. don't tell me she also misnderstood u!

[Hulkster]

Phew...actually there would not have a misunderstanding had i finished correcting the previous post...athu kullarae three posts stating their agitations and i had to explain this and that before i could finally correct...well it is a learning experience for me to handle human emotions.

[bingleguy]

ok guys ... C u all :wave: idhu eppo seri aaradho ... shall continue from there !

[Hulkster]

Yes she misunderstood me too as she felt that i was not in support of what she said...and also she read my previous post and after reading that she got abit disinterested in the other posts already.

[Hulkster]

Poithu vaanga BG...naalikke paarpom..:wave:

[Lambretta]

Fire...even a good person can be forced to do anything bad according to circumstances...yethu yeppo nadukkum nu namakku theriyaathu...what im trying to say that there are people who were good and decent before such things happened.
Sorry hulk anna, I cudnt bring myself to agree on this one point....:(
If those ppl. r really good & decent, they shud hav enuff knowledge abt wat they MUST control or avoid if feasible......circumstances can be taken into account only if they r compelled/forced to do it.....but to the best of my knowledge rapists normally wudnt be forced into committing such an act.

[Hulkster]

Would also like to state that there is a huge difference in the way sensitive things like puberty and sex are perceived here....maybe people dunt really see it in a general point of view as i do..:(

[Fire111999]

I am not seeing she has to marry...she can choose to marry and to support that i quote a few examples where they have done that..and what you stated is a possible scenario that can arise...in that scenario of course she will not marry that person.

so u're talking back your words? i mean, u did say that a girl who values her dignity and honour will marry that guy, right? so do u admit that tt's crap?

fire naan thaan unga kitae sollitaenae...read the next post after that...i corrected what i actually meant by that...i accidentally forgot to post the scenarios due to me typing too fast....what i meant is that if a girl is someone who believes in marrying the person who touches her body whether it is willingly or unwilling done..she will marry the person...i forgot to post this which made you interpret my post like that.

(sorry vasanth, can;t stop myself!)

yeah right, hulk! i believe u! u forgot to post that right?

and so it's not my fault or crazy's fault for interpretin ur post in that way!

[bingleguy]

Hulk .. be a little slower when u are posting such critical topics ... these topics are very sensitive ... so even f u do a typing mistake ... u will be totally misunderstood !

Fire ... i dont see him doin escapism ... anyways .. u have observer him more than me ! so u can judge .... but prove ur points ... :-)

[Lambretta]

ok guys ... C u all :wave: idhu eppo seri aaradho ... shall continue from there !
Hmm.....u know wat? Tats an excellent idea! Will do the same! :D :wave:

[Fire111999]

Fire...even a good person can be forced to do anything bad according to circumstances...yethu yeppo nadukkum nu namakku theriyaathu...what im trying to say that there are people who were good and decent before such things happened.
Sorry hulk anna, I cudnt bring myself to agree on this one point....:(
If those ppl. r really good & decent, they shud hav enuff knowledge abt wat they MUST control or avoid if feasible......circumstances can be taken into account only if they r compelled/forced to do it.....but to the best of my knowledge rapists normally wudnt be forced into committing such an act.

agree, anna!

[Hulkster]

Fire...even a good person can be forced to do anything bad according to circumstances...yethu yeppo nadukkum nu namakku theriyaathu...what im trying to say that there are people who were good and decent before such things happened.
Sorry hulk anna, I cudnt bring myself to agree on this one point....:(
If those ppl. r really good & decent, they shud hav enuff knowledge abt wat they MUST control or avoid if feasible......circumstances can be taken into account only if they r compelled/forced to do it.....but to the best of my knowledge rapists normally wudnt be forced into committing such an act.

Agree pennulae na it is not wrong pa...there is no rule to agree with me...actually thats what i meant..as for the rapists part...they can be forced by their own sudden hatred for this girl.....i.e..this person was in love with this girl...the girl humiliates him instead of rejecting him politely...he takes revenge due to this by raping her...the way i perceive things is inducing scenarios and analyse each one of them to see how things happen...that is why the slight difference...good point though lamby sir..:thumbsup:

[Fire111999]

Would also like to state that there is a huge difference in the way sensitive things like puberty and sex are perceived here....maybe people dunt really see it in a general point of view as i do..:(

u should make it clear what u're talking abt. if u say that love has nothing to do with sex and don't state that u're talking abt the biological process of sex, of course pple will start yelling at you! this is not seeing things from a general point of view! this is not stating yourself clearly. no one will argue with you if u were to say taht the in analysis sex in a bio point of view, love is not invovled. but tt's not what u said. u have to learn to be more explicit in your comments!

[Hulkster]

I am not seeing she has to marry...she can choose to marry and to support that i quote a few examples where they have done that..and what you stated is a possible scenario that can arise...in that scenario of course she will not marry that person.

so u're talking back your words? i mean, u did say that a girl who values her dignity and honour will marry that guy, right? so do u admit that tt's crap?

fire naan thaan unga kitae sollitaenae...read the next post after that...i corrected what i actually meant by that...i accidentally forgot to post the scenarios due to me typing too fast....what i meant is that if a girl is someone who believes in marrying the person who touches her body whether it is willingly or unwilling done..she will marry the person...i forgot to post this which made you interpret my post like that.

(sorry vasanth, can;t stop myself!)

yeah right, hulk! i believe u! u forgot to post that right?

and so it's not my fault or crazy's fault for interpretin ur post in that way!

Paarthaengela?...i would have posted it...it is the subsequent responses which had to force me to type other posts as well...before i could explain there were alot of posts coming..thats y...fire try to control your agitations...as from a personal point of view it can like force you to ignore truths at times...yetho advice kodukuraen...dunt think im agitated with you or anything...i have no qualms with anybody for that matter too.

[Fire111999]

Fire...even a good person can be forced to do anything bad according to circumstances...yethu yeppo nadukkum nu namakku theriyaathu...what im trying to say that there are people who were good and decent before such things happened.
Sorry hulk anna, I cudnt bring myself to agree on this one point....:(
If those ppl. r really good & decent, they shud hav enuff knowledge abt wat they MUST control or avoid if feasible......circumstances can be taken into account only if they r compelled/forced to do it.....but to the best of my knowledge rapists normally wudnt be forced into committing such an act.

Agree pennulae na it is not wrong pa...there is no rule to agree with me...actually thats what i meant..as for the rapists part...they can be forced by their own sudden hatred for this girl.....i.e..this person was in love with this girl...the girl humiliates him instead of rejecting him politely...he takes revenge due to this by raping her...the way i perceive things is inducing scenarios and analyse each one of them to see how things happen...that is why the slight difference...good point though lamby sir..:thumbsup:

as if the guy's right in the scenario u just painted! he's the uthama purushan!

[Hulkster]

Would also like to state that there is a huge difference in the way sensitive things like puberty and sex are perceived here....maybe people dunt really see it in a general point of view as i do..:(

u should make it clear what u're talking abt. if u say that love has nothing to do with sex and don't state that u're talking abt the biological process of sex, of course pple will start yelling at you! this is not seeing things from a general point of view! this is not stating yourself clearly. no one will argue with you if u were to say taht the in analysis sex in a bio point of view, love is not invovled. but tt's not what u said. u have to learn to be more explicit in your comments!

Well i thought my post was clear enough that i was explaining the process of sex of how the hormones induce lust and then sex comes...seri vidunga...btw it is also a good practice to read into ones words carefully before any decision...sometimes hastiness can lead to such reactions like yelling..:D

[Fire111999]

Paarthaengela?...i would have posted it...it is the subsequent responses which had to force me to type other posts as well...before i could explain there were alot of posts coming..thats y...fire try to control your agitations...as from a personal point of view it can like force you to ignore truths at times...yetho advice kodukuraen...dunt think im agitated with you or anything...i have no qualms with anybody for that matter too.

hello! i was being sarcastic! i don't need ur advice! u need to express urself in a clearer way! anyway, i have to go now. sorry i can't stay and finish the argument!

[Fire111999]

Would also like to state that there is a huge difference in the way sensitive things like puberty and sex are perceived here....maybe people dunt really see it in a general point of view as i do..:(

u should make it clear what u're talking abt. if u say that love has nothing to do with sex and don't state that u're talking abt the biological process of sex, of course pple will start yelling at you! this is not seeing things from a general point of view! this is not stating yourself clearly. no one will argue with you if u were to say taht the in analysis sex in a bio point of view, love is not invovled. but tt's not what u said. u have to learn to be more explicit in your comments!

Well i thought my post was clear enough that i was explaining the process of sex of how the hormones induce lust and then sex comes...seri vidunga...btw it is also a good practice to read into ones words carefully before any decision...sometimes hastiness can lead to such reactions like yelling..:D
no one would have read from your statement that u're talking bio. anyway, gtg.

[Hulkster]

Fire...even a good person can be forced to do anything bad according to circumstances...yethu yeppo nadukkum nu namakku theriyaathu...what im trying to say that there are people who were good and decent before such things happened.
Sorry hulk anna, I cudnt bring myself to agree on this one point....:(
If those ppl. r really good & decent, they shud hav enuff knowledge abt wat they MUST control or avoid if feasible......circumstances can be taken into account only if they r compelled/forced to do it.....but to the best of my knowledge rapists normally wudnt be forced into committing such an act.

Agree pennulae na it is not wrong pa...there is no rule to agree with me...actually thats what i meant..as for the rapists part...they can be forced by their own sudden hatred for this girl.....i.e..this person was in love with this girl...the girl humiliates him instead of rejecting him politely...he takes revenge due to this by raping her...the way i perceive things is inducing scenarios and analyse each one of them to see how things happen...that is why the slight difference...good point though lamby sir..:thumbsup:

as if the guy's right in the scenario u just painted! he's the uthama purushan!

Achocho fire madam...your yet again misunderstanding my post...im not saying he is a super uthaman..im highlighting that sometimes emotions can force one to rape...seems like your really agitated and that makes it hard for you to interpret my posts.

[Hulkster]

Hmms seri...poithu vaanga...this was not meant to be a argument..but sulnilai eppadi ayitru...paravalae...ulugathilae nadakaatha vishayama nadanthu pochi?..:D

[Lambretta]

As for sex, we all know sex is actually meant to create children and as certain people see it,pleasure but it is only meant for a husband and wife.However westerners saw sex as a healthy way of living and also saw it like some sort of normal activity to be done between anybody whom you date...:banghead:...because of this, the beauty of sex being done first time between the husband and wife was lost and not only that, it was also made to look disgusting.
(Hulk, sory I missed out reading these earlier posts of urs.....)
Yea, very much true....but ironically, many of our Indians r very much going their way now....:(

[Hulkster]

Lambretta that is where self control and the ability to see right and wrong must come in...mattavanga tappa seinchaanganu namakku yengae buthi pochi...paravalae lamby..naanum neengalum sernthu talks on righteousness nu oru organsation arambippom...yeppadi?

[Lambretta]

Thats true...of course it is their way of practising as no religion discusses any sort of oppression over women....this can only change the faster we get to these societies and show them first hand the effects of such practices.
Well, we seem to be getting to these ssocieties fast enuff w/ so many of our own ppl. abroad & w/ globalisation etc.....but at the present, we need to show ourselves the first hand effects of such practices, rather than showing them.......'cos our own ppl. r going the same way as they hav....! :(

[Raikkonen]

Aiii..
Ithu oru nalla topic..

Ipdi oru visyam irukkumnu terinjirutha eppavo naan en girlfriend oda villageku odiruppen...

[Hulkster]

Yeppa our own people nu pirichi paarkathaenge pa...ellarum manushanga thaan...ellarukkum ratham thaan oduthu...(although in certain cases kanda kanda ratham dilute aagi oduthu)...Showing them is the only way they will learn the consequences as for now...vera vali irukaa nu yosanai pennunum.

[Lambretta]

Lambretta that is where self control and the ability to see right and wrong must come in...mattavanga tappa seinchaanganu namakku yengae buthi pochi...paravalae lamby..naanum neengalum sernthu talks on righteousness nu oru organsation arambippom...yeppadi?
Hulk....organisations ippo varikum neriya vanthurku....atleast in India.....but as I said earlier, this is like, a current flowing strongly in one direction......as long as it is strong, it is futile for ppl. like us to oppose this current! Innoru Ramakrishna Paramahansar/Vivekanandar varthuku evolo naal agumo entho.......! :(

[Hulkster]

Aiii..
Ithu oru nalla topic..

Ipdi oru visyam irukkumnu terinjirutha eppavo naan en girlfriend oda villageku odiruppen...

Appovae unga intentions melae santhaegam irunthichi...eppo confirm ayiduchi...muthalae ungalai alichaal ellamae seri ayidum..YEDUDAA ARUVAALAE!

[Lambretta]

Aiii..
Ithu oru nalla topic..

Ipdi oru visyam irukkumnu terinjirutha eppavo naan en girlfriend oda villageku odiruppen...
Villegaeku neenga 2 peru odi poyirntha villagers ungle ethirichi adi adi adichirpanguh! :P :roll:

[Hulkster]

Lambretta that is where self control and the ability to see right and wrong must come in...mattavanga tappa seinchaanganu namakku yengae buthi pochi...paravalae lamby..naanum neengalum sernthu talks on righteousness nu oru organsation arambippom...yeppadi?
Hulk....organisations ippo varikum neriya vanthurku....atleast in India.....but as I said earlier, this is like, a current flowing strongly in one direction......as long as it is strong, it is futile for ppl. like us to oppose this current! Innoru Ramakrishna Paramahansar/Vivekanandar varthuku evolo naal agumo entho.......! :(

Why must we wait for them to resurface again?...nammalae aayitta pochi...:D

[Lambretta]

Yeppa our own people nu pirichi paarkathaenge pa...ellarum manushanga thaan...ellarukkum ratham thaan oduthu...(although in certain cases kanda kanda ratham dilute aagi oduthu)...Showing them is the only way they will learn the consequences as for now...vera vali irukaa nu yosanai pennunum.
Ille hulk.....I meant in response to wat u said tat we shud get to these societies first & show them the 1st hand effects of such acts......so how r we going to do tat wen many among us ourselves r going the same way......how wud they believe us then? :oops: :(

[Raikkonen]

Chinna vayasule kalyanam pannthan India China levelku vara mudiyum... Population level-le

[Hulkster]

Aiii..
Ithu oru nalla topic..

Ipdi oru visyam irukkumnu terinjirutha eppavo naan en girlfriend oda villageku odiruppen...
Villegaeku neenga 2 peru odi poyirntha villagers ungle ethirichi adi adi adichirpanguh! :P :roll:

Panchaayathu decision veru irukku...in fact pathineithu patti decisionum irukku....yega patta adi thaan ponga...

[Lambretta]

Why must we wait for them to resurface again?...nammalae aayitta pochi...:D
Ana namma kittenthu inspiration varanum naa namma kuda Gandhi/RK/V level aala aganum! :)

[Hulkster]

Oh appadi solluraengelae..naan society sonnuthu namma mathiri sathasari manushangalei ellam...athu seri...how do we show them such first hand effects...drama penni kaatuvoma?..:D

[Hulkster]

Chinna vayasule kalyanam pannthan India China levelku vara mudiyum... Population level-le

Intha mathiri na tsunami and earthquake sernthukittu varum...:lol:


Lamby antha levelukku namma vara thevai ellei...by starting it amongst our family members..then slowly to our friends..then slowly to our surroundings..thaanaalae perisa ayiduvom...that is how vivekananda and co started out as well...:D

[Lambretta]

Oh appadi solluraengelae..naan society sonnuthu namma mathiri sathasari manushangalei ellam...athu seri...how do we show them such first hand effects...drama penni kaatuvoma?..:D
Eankum athu oru :?: aa thonnarthu.... :(
Neways, neenga vanthu Western societies patthi pesara mathiri thonithu....atthan appidi sonnen.....:)

[Raikkonen]

Sari wrong threaku vanthutten..
Yarume ennai kandukalai...

[Lambretta]

Lamby antha levelukku namma vara thevai ellei...by starting it amongst our family members..then slowly to our friends..then slowly to our surroundings..thaanaalae perisa ayiduvom...that is how vivekananda and co started out as well...:D
Yea tat is true....we can always implement it among family members successfully.......but not feeling tat sure-footed beyond tat....!

[Hulkster]

Kandukamaleiya ungalai pathi yega patta response varum NTR siru?

[Lambretta]

Kandukamaleiya ungalai pathi yega patta response varum NTR siru?
*digr* Btw, Hulk, avarode ID ithuku minne "NTR" nu ungaluku epidi theriyum? :?

[Hulkster]

avar NTR nu rombo peru pesi pesi naanae therinchikittaen

[Lambretta]

*dgr*

:lol: Ok....

/dgr

[goodsense]

Digression:

Hulkster,

Couldn't help coming back to clarify one important point. You said sex is the same as rape. No they aren't. Sex occurs when there is mutual consent between the parties. Rape occurs when there is "absence of consent" by one party. It is often difficult to establish at what point rape occured i.e. at what point the parties consented.

The whole issue of consent and at what point it is evident, is a whole different topic.

[goodsense]

Surprise the crowd is not out as yet :roll: It's usually out by this time :lol: I feel everything is happening while I am sleeping 8-)

[Querida]

wow what a debate I can see clearly why fire and crazy replied in that way to you Hulkster...don't worry i'm cool and not arguing,

it is in the way in which you in describing certain scenarios seem to almost commend or justify it, that hopefully is not your intention at all..but it would greatly help if you outrightly said This of course is very wrong or criminal when
"emotions can force one to rape", but then again i see emotions as a petty excuse because it is like the same excuse used by drunkerds, just because they are drunk it is all of a sudden understandable that they act in such violent, perverse ways.

I don't know how much can emotion blind you to act in such a inhumane way? I do not see excuse in this, I don't care if a girl embarasses a guy on live television in front of everyone of his family and friends....it gives him no whatsoever excuse to hurt her in this way.

[Hulkster]

Digression:

Hulkster,

Couldn't help coming back to clarify one important point. You said sex is the same as rape. No they aren't. Sex occurs when there is mutual consent between the parties. Rape occurs when there is "absence of consent" by one party. It is often difficult to establish at what point rape occured i.e. at what point the parties consented.

The whole issue of consent and at what point it is evident, is a whole different topic.

Oh...what i meant was rape involves sex as in it is sex forced upon a woman....i guess my hurried way of explaining to both of them took toll on what i was trying to make sense. Thanks for your explanations.

[Hulkster]

wow what a debate I can see clearly why fire and crazy replied in that way to you Hulkster...don't worry i'm cool and not arguing,

it is in the way in which you in describing certain scenarios seem to almost commend or justify it, that hopefully is not your intention at all..but it would greatly help if you outrightly said This of course is very wrong or criminal when
"emotions can force one to rape", but then again i see emotions as a petty excuse because it is like the same excuse used by drunkerds, just because they are drunk it is all of a sudden understandable that they act in such violent, perverse ways.

I don't know how much can emotion blind you to act in such a inhumane way? I do not see excuse in this, I don't care if a girl embarasses a guy on live television in front of everyone of his family and friends....it gives him no whatsoever excuse to hurt her in this way.

Nah its okay..arguments need to happen at times...it is a good experience for me to handle heated arguments too..:D....yes i and you know that emotions can be a petty excuse...but at the same times these people let their emotions overtake them instead of controlling them and that is why such crimes happen....there were alot of things i typed wrongly which contradicted my earlier posts...maybe if i had slowed down and not try to post a reply to each of their posts i could have made sense of what i was trying to say...sometimes we have to look on at both points of view.

Your right saying one crime does not hide a mistake done by the girl...but some people are not able to take it and it ensues in such types of crimes...yes this is certainly criminal..rape is always a crime..what i was trying to tell them was that it is not necessary the person has to be a baddie for his whole life to rape a girl..some people can easily be twisted into such things and even if they knew it was done in a haste and wrong...they still have to be punished as its a crime...thanks for your comments Querida..:thumbsup:

[Hulkster]

Surprise the crowd is not out as yet :roll: It's usually out by this time :lol: I feel everything is happening while I am sleeping 8-)

:lol: you forgot im in singapore and your in canada...just when you came i was off to sleep as it was 12 am already.

[Lambretta]

what i was trying to tell them was that it is not necessary the person has to be a baddie for his whole life to rape a girl..some people can easily be twisted into such things and even if they knew it was done in a haste and wrong...they still have to be punished as its a crime...
Tat certainly shud clear up things now, hulk! :D

[Hulkster]

Appadi mettum clear aanichi na unga vaayilae sakkarai uthuvaen...:lol:

[Lambretta]

Appadi mettum clear aanichi na unga vaayilae sakkarai uthuvaen...:lol:
:lol:

[crazy]

[
Nah its okay..arguments need to happen at times...it is a good experience for me to handle heated arguments too..:D....yes i and you know that emotions can be a petty excuse...but at the same times these people let their emotions overtake them instead of controlling them and that is why such crimes happen....there were alot of things i typed wrongly which contradicted my earlier posts...maybe if i had slowed down and not try to post a reply to each of their posts i could have made sense of what i was trying to say...sometimes we have to look on at both points of view.

Your right saying one crime does not hide a mistake done by the girl...but some people are not able to take it and it ensues in such types of crimes...yes this is certainly criminal..rape is always a crime..what i was trying to tell them was that it is not necessary the person has to be a baddie for his whole life to rape a girl..some people can easily be twisted into such things and even if they knew it was done in a haste and wrong...they still have to be punished as its a crime...thanks for your comments Querida..:thumbsup:

:roll: :)

[Fire111999]

yes this is certainly criminal..rape is always a crime..what i was trying to tell them was that it is not necessary the person has to be a baddie for his whole life to rape a girl..some people can easily be twisted into such things and even if they knew it was done in a haste and wrong...they still have to be punished as its a crime...thanks for your comments Querida..:thumbsup:

yeah, whatever. but i still don't see y the girl has to marry the guy if she values her dignity and honour. that's just crap.

[crazy]

fire
hulk has already said that was typing mistake! i dont think there is any more answer to be expect from him!
leave him!

[Fire111999]

fire
hulk has already said that was typing mistake! i dont think there is any more answer to be expect from him!
leave him!

fine, but he didn't really admit it explicitly. but nvrmind! let's get back to the topic.

i didn't know that early marriages still happen. i mean, isn't it against the law to marry before 18? or is this not so?

[crazy]

fire
hulk has already said that was typing mistake! i dont think there is any more answer to be expect from him!
leave him!

fine, but he didn't really admit it explicitly. but nvrmind! let's get back to the topic.

i didn't know that early marriages still happen. i mean, isn't it against the law to marry before 18? or is this not so?

yes he didn't. but lets get over it!
i think it still happens! one of my friend she married last yr, she was just 18 then.!!!!!!!!!!ok it is not so young, but 18 in city hmhmmmmmmmmmm i dont know what she thought!

[Fire111999]

but well, i know a girl in uni here in the uk who got married last summer when she was only 19 yrs old. but that's her own choice. and she's still continuing her studies. i think we are talking more abt girls in villages in india who r married off by their parents and their studies r stopped as well, sometimes against the girl's wishes.

and is marriage before 18 legal?

[Fire111999]

oh, and was it ur friend's choice? i have a friend in chennai who got married at 21 but then she fell in love with the guy and got married with her parents' consent. she went on to study further (masters i think) after that. she has a little girl now and she's very happy.

[Lambretta]

but well, i know a girl in uni here in the uk who got married last summer when she was only 19 yrs old. but that's her own choice. and she's still continuing her studies. i think we are talking more abt girls in villages in india who r married off by their parents and their studies r stopped as well, sometimes against the girl's wishes.

and is marriage before 18 legal?
Yea, 18 is legal for girls, 21 for guys.....

[Querida]

in montreal it's 14 for girls with parents consent..but now it's changed to 16.. :o

[Fire111999]

:shock: 14? 16? :shock:

[crazy]

yeah in norway to u can marry at 16 but u need ur parents consent!

[Lambretta]

Wow, interesting! :roll: & I thot driving is the only thing legally allowed in those countries at 16 itself.....!

[crazy]

Wow, interesting! :roll: & I thot driving is the only thing legally allowed in those countries at 16 itself.....!

there r lots of other things too!

[Lambretta]

*digr

Wow, interesting! :roll: & I thot driving is the only thing legally allowed in those countries at 16 itself.....!
there r lots of other things too!
Wat abt consuming alcohol in Norway? In the US I believe u hav to be 21 to tatse even wine, in Singapore I understand 18 is the legal age for alcohol....
/digr

[crazy]

alcohol is 18, but some sort of alcohol is after 21!

[Hulkster]

Lamby but it seems certain countries are taking measures to even stop cigarette....cigarette can be smoked at the age of 18...but the government has increased the price of cigarette packs from 4 dollars per pack to 9 dollars per pack....some of them have even quit smoking after these rule came.

About alcohol,it is mainly used to keep the body warm in cold countries...but however the abuse of it
is the reason why there have been strict measures on it...even if they do allow it...i hope humans can see what are the bad effects of drinking. evanga ellam kudichikittu ottinaal veetukku pogama matra uyirgalum ottraanga...enna thaan seivetho..