MOTHER IN LAW PROBLEMS

[Niranjana]

My sister is having issues with her Mother in law. She controls her son and decides how they should live. She interferes in everything & is turning out to be quite a nag. Are there others here with the same prob?

[seonaid]

niranjan dear,the problem is with your husband. Check him first.
seon

[Roshan]

adappAvi :shock:

[a.ratchasi]

Way to go, seoniod! :clap:
:lol: :lol: :lol:

[Roshan]

a.r.

i'm confused with your applause :roll:

[Roshan]

ok ok now I got it.. :lol: :lol:

[seonaid]

sorry nira, your sisters' husband.
seon

[Shekhar]

This is a hub mafia-ed by women hubbers.. :) Now they will all start blaming the husband.. It doesn't matter whose husband it is, Nira's or her sisters..either will do as long as it is husband. :lol: :lol:

Sorry Nira.. FH has a hooligan atmosphere (more so by women!! :roll: :lol: ) You cannot expect a serious solution to the problem here...

[seonaid]

please shekar,
no mafia affair.seen m.in law being bullied beyond limit by executive d.in.law-head of family hubby is helpless.
d.in.law also bullied and tortured--the head is helpless.
i only sujested who to take a firm hand in running the family.I just heard a m.in law wishig for a 'netrikkan' as petrol cans are forbidden-so sore was the poor old lady.
don't brand me KKK--
peace loving soul.
seon

[Niranjana]

Pls, I request you not to make a joke of it. My eldersis is just 2 years elder than me, so we arelike friends more than sisters. I hate to say this but it is shocking, shameful and just ridiculous.

Her motherinlaw goes upstairs every now and then and once she peeped into the window while my sister & hubby were in bed! My sister hates to live there after this incident.

[Querida]

that is quite extreme!.... :o does your sister's mil have no one else to stay with? Is she widowed? If your sister's husband the only son? Is your sister's husband know of his mother's habits or does he think your sister is not being truthful or worse he just denies it and blames it on old age? Really i cannot see anyway around then having your bil lay down some rules...

[nirosha sen]

:lol: If things are that bad, why doesn't your sister demand to move out, Pa???!!!! Like Q's query, isn't there anyone else sis's mother in law could live with???

At the end of the day, she has to put her foot down, and make a stand for herself and her marriage! Peeping Toms as m-i-ls is a no-no!! :evil:

[seonaid]

hasn't the mil daughters? get the daughters deal with her unearthly habbit.Poor girl, pick up little courage-if your sis, can't fight her join her and tackle her with some psychology.Something is terribly wrong with that woman,Nira.
seon

[a.ratchasi]

Hmmmm, and we are branded as hooligans! :roll: :roll:
Anyways, Q is right. What does your BIL say to this, Niranjana?

[nirosha sen]

Not only that, dealing with an elder requires more than gumption alone from your sister, Nira! Since most Indian marriages are arranged, this too requires the meddling of more than just her frayed emotions alone.

The way I see it, your family too has to come to your sister's rescue, instead of everyone pretending not to know anything. Because this is one reason why her MIL could be taking the upper hand. That nobody cares enough to fight their own daughter's cause.

Peeping Toms are sick individuals. I wouldn't be surprised if she does it to wreck your sister's sanity Pa!! Because this way, with the constant fear of prying eyes, your sister could become frigid and withhold herself from any kind of affectionate displays towards her husband. This in turn, would certainly put tremendous strain on her conjugal relationship with her husband!! :(

[a.ratchasi]

What Niro has mentioned here is very true.

[blahblah]

Aren't you all jumping in before you have the facts?I would be surprised if this sister of Niranjana didn't ask her husband what his mother was doing there!And I will be again surpised if she didn't have some sort of an answer or the husband didn't confront his mother! :roll:

[Badri]

Yes, that seems to be a valid question. Did Nira's sister just keep quiet about the incident, and not raise it even with her husband?

Surely, he'll find it just as embarrassing and ridiculous as she did and would have liked to get to the bottom of it!

[nirosha sen]

Yup! I certainly agree with you guys! So now, it's upto Niranjana to enlighten us further with more details Pa!! No need for so much breast-beating with so little infor., okay Nira???

Kindly furnish us with more details, Pa! :)

[Niranjana]

that is quite extreme!.... :o does your sister's mil have no one else to stay with? Is she widowed? If your sister's husband the only son? Is your sister's husband know of his mother's habits or does he think your sister is not being truthful or worse he just denies it and blames it on old age? Really i cannot see anyway around then having your bil lay down some rules...

Yes, Querida, this is the EXTREME> THe funny thing is
a. She is NOT widowed.
b. My bil is NOT the only child
c. My bil 'justifies his mother saying that she must have come upstairs for a genuine purpose.
d. When her younger son is around, she focusses more attention on him. It is only when he is not in India that she tries to take charge of her elder son & his wife. It is obvious that she loves the younger one more as he earns 10 times more than his brother. She shows it openly.

Still my bil does not want to move out. He also says he has financial problems. My father is ready to help but he does not want to take his help.

[Niranjana]

Not only that, dealing with an elder requires more than gumption alone from your sister, Nira! Since most Indian marriages are arranged, this too requires the meddling of more than just her frayed emotions alone.

The way I see it, your family too has to come to your sister's rescue, instead of everyone pretending not to know anything. Because this is one reason why her MIL could be taking the upper hand. That nobody cares enough to fight their own daughter's cause.

Peeping Toms are sick individuals. I wouldn't be surprised if she does it to wreck your sister's sanity Pa!! Because this way, with the constant fear of prying eyes, your sister could become frigid and withhold herself from any kind of affectionate displays towards her husband. This in turn, would certainly put tremendous strain on her conjugal relationship with her husband!! :(





Thankyou so much for your concern, support & advice.

My sister feels very agitated, irritated & uncomfortable in that hse because her mil interferes in everything.

She says she is always tensed to have sex there because what if the mil peeps in?

In our home, my parents are more sensible. We give them all the privacy of a newly married couple. Here, they can lock the door and windows open outside, there's no window by which anyone can peep into their room. Moreover, my parents always ring the intercom if they have to tell her something or call her downstairs. Not pry like this!

[scorpio]

Niranjana,

Is this one-time peeping was the only thing that has hurt your sister?? Or is she harassed in other ways too?? Like, being the wife of a not-so-well-earning son?? One relationship where there is no room for secrets is the one between spouses. Your sister must bring to the attention of your BIL all that has hurt her. She should take care not to make this complaining sessions a routine habit but bring to attention whenevr he has the time to listen. Probably, with some resistance to all these nonsense from her own son, the MIL will certainly mend her ways.

[Niranjana]

Aren't you all jumping in before you have the facts?I would be surprised if this sister of Niranjana didn't ask her husband what his mother was doing there!And I will be again surpised if she didn't have some sort of an answer or the husband didn't confront his mother! :roll:

Well, he did know it until she told him. He fell asleep soon after you- know -what. When she told him, he justified his mother, saying that she must have come upstairs for a genuine purpose. Sis hates staying there after this incident.

[Niranjana]

Niranjana,

Is this one-time peeping was the only thing that has hurt your sister?? Or is she harassed in other ways too?? Like, being the wife of a not-so-well-earning son?? One relationship where there is no room for secrets is the one between spouses. Your sister must bring to the attention of your BIL all that has hurt her. She should take care not to make this complaining sessions a routine habit but bring to attention whenevr he has the time to listen. Probably, with some resistance to all these nonsense from her own son, the MIL will certainly mend her ways.

Thankyou Scorpio.

No this is not the only incident.

Whatever my sister buys, her mil criticises.

For eg, a Friend in US gave her a Cucumber deo when they came on vacation. We all felt that it smelt fresh & cool. Her mother-in-law commented that it has a rotten smell. No one had asked her opinion.

When my sister bought a tye & dye saree from Jaipur, that stupid lady commented that it looks like an old dust cloth. It was an anniversary gift from my brother-inlaw. WE all liked the saree. It is a beautiful green and maroon one with silver sparkles on it.
No one had asked her opinion.

When my sister wore a pair of fashionable Ruby earrings when she went there, this idiotic hag said that it looks very cheap. But they were expensive ones. No one had asked her opinion.

I think she is just jealous that she never got to buy such fancy stuff when she was young though she was a pretty woman.

[Niranjana]

She constantly nags my sister for not conceiving, though my sis has gone thru a whole series of tests and the doctors have confirmed that she's perfectly alright. IT is my bil who has not yet gone for a Sperm test!

Bleady idiot, when is she going to die?

[Niranjana]

hasn't the mil daughters? get the daughters deal with her unearthly habbit.Poor girl, pick up little courage-if your sis, can't fight her join her and tackle her with some psychology.Something is terribly wrong with that woman,Nira.
seon

No daughters. Only 2 sons.

My poor sister came back home day before yesterday and she does not want to go back. They may come for a talk this week. She will obviously 'justify' her reasons. Cunning old Hag!

[scorpio]

Oh dear, pls. dont lose words.. What's life without a little challenge?? Infact, I was about to write all this wouldn't matter at all to your sister if she has a child of her own so that she will not find time even to get bothered by these trivial intrusions by the MIL. Can we dictate when someone will conceive or not?? Now that it is clear on paper that your sis is perfectly fine, then leave things to God and just not to worry at all.

Your sister's MIL behaviour no doubt is unwarranted but is it enough reason for yr sis to forego all happiness in life?? If the peeping has happened only once, let her not bother and remember to close doors and windows as a routine. MIL cant stare thru' closed windows, can she??

Your family should support and counsel yr sis to just ignore all unnecessary comments about sarees, perfumes etc etc. It is very easy to tear away a relationship, but very difficult to mend it.

[dev]

Yep,Scorpio is right...ask ur sis to ignore all those silly comments... Just don't react to her MIL's comments & show off as if she never bothered abt it... These ppl will stop commenting(or atleast reduce it) once they find tht the opposite party is not reacting & not being hurt... Ask her to try it out for sometime...let's see if this works...:)

[blahblah]

Niranjana,from what you said:

1.I feel that your sister's husband is having some problem to father a child.
2.Your sister simply refuse to acknowedge facts.If someone takes you on so straight,what will you do?My answer is stand up and fight.After all is she benefittrd from a husband or mother in law like this?not at all!She has a life of her own and what I would say is the sooner she gets rid of them the better for her :? .

[Niranjana]

Yep,Scorpio is right...ask ur sis to ignore all those silly comments... Just don't react to her MIL's comments & show off as if she never bothered abt it... These ppl will stop commenting(or atleast reduce it) once they find tht the opposite party is not reacting & not being hurt... Ask her to try it out for sometime...let's see if this works...:)

No, Dev, My sister has not reacted to these comments though she has felt very bad.

[Niranjana]

Niranjana,from what you said:

1.I feel that your sister's husband is having some problem to father a child.
2.Your sister simply refuse to acknowedge facts.If someone takes you on so straight,what will you do?My answer is stand up and fight.After all is she benefittrd from a husband or mother in law like this?not at all!She has a life of her own and what I would say is the sooner she gets rid of them the better for her :? .

I don't know. They have been married for two years now. He has not seen a Doctor until now. God knows why! My sister completed all tests last April itself.

[dev]

Hey blahblah... That should be the last option ...

[Cinefan]

It is very easy to tear away a relationship, but very difficult to mend it.

How true,well said akka. :thumbsup:

[dev]

Not being able to father a child shouldn't be a problem if ur sis is in gud r'ship with him...They can always adopt one if need be...

[nirosha sen]

:shock: Oh boy Nira!! I think your sis's mil is probably just way too possessive over her son and fears losing her esteemed position as head of the household, Pa!! It's the same fear in most households!!

But the peeping incident is what bothers me!! Worst, your b-i-l knows that she had been there to witness all the moaning and groaning of what took place, Pa!! I wouldn't be surprised she had purposely done that for voyeuristic reasons!! She was probably having a kick watching the son and d-i-l!! A live peep-show!! Clearly, it makes me sick!!

Just how long have this couple been married or have I lost that vital pc of infor. somewhere?? :roll: And does your sis work outside the house??? At least that ought to give her some peace and respite, Pa!!

[Querida]

ok ok Niro please i am asking kindly that we shouldn't make this incident more perverse than it already is....and Nira i know you are fustrated but please don't use such words...i know you love your sis and can't stand someone who does such things to make her miserable...the main reason i say this to both of you is that to be fair (even if mil is wrong and your sis is not in this instance) we only know the story thru you that you heard from your sis...so not whole story from all sides...furthermore this is quickly turning to another issue altogether...all i can say is for your sister to confront and demand something to be done....besides that i can only say that your love for your sis will only make you more biased towards her mil and whatever her situation/reasons are...which will in turn only bring up the negative things you know about the mil....

(as an aside...from the families i know where mil is trouble causing ...it is not because it is her most beloved son she does this to rather it is the one who is not her favourite....is this just a representative sample i have encountered or do others' find this true as well)

[Roshan]

ok ok Niro please i am asking kindly that we shouldn't make this incident more perverse than it already is....and Nira i know you are fustrated but please don't use such words...i know you love your sis and can't stand someone who does such things to make her miserable...the main reason i say this to both of you is that to be fair (even if mil is wrong and your sis is not in this instance) we only know the story thru you that you heard from your sis...so not whole story from all sides...furthermore this is quickly turning to another issue altogether...all i can say is for your sister to confront and demand something to be done....besides that i can only say that your love for your sis will only make you more biased towards her mil and whatever her situation/reasons are...which will in turn only bring up the negative things you know about the mil....


A sensible reply !!!


(as an aside...from the families i know where mil is trouble causing ...it is not because it is her most beloved son she does this to rather it is the one who is not her favourite....is this just a representative sample i have encountered or do others' find this true as well)

Querida,

I too have heard such things and have always wondered as to how a mother could have favourites among her children ? :roll: :twisted: If that is the case I dont think she can be called a good mother :x and such a mother deifinitely cannot be a good MIL too. :x

[Niranjana]

:shock: Oh boy Nira!! I think your sis's mil is probably just way too possessive over her son and fears losing her esteemed position as head of the household, Pa!! It's the same fear in most households!!

But the peeping incident is what bothers me!! Worst, your b-i-l knows that she had been there to witness all the moaning and groaning of what took place, Pa!! I wouldn't be surprised she had purposely done that for voyeuristic reasons!! She was probably having a kick watching the son and d-i-l!! A live peep-show!! Clearly, it makes me sick!!

Just how long have this couple been married or have I lost that vital pc of infor. somewhere?? :roll: And does your sis work outside the house??? At least that ought to give her some peace and respite, Pa!!


They have been married for 2 years now. She cannot work for a lot odf reasons. She's an MBA. But the job opportunities are so narrow in the place she lives. Moreover, her husband has got Shift duties, so if she goes for work, their timings may clash. She spends her time between the two homes.

She's planning to take tuitions this year, at home. I'm sure that'll give her a diversion.

[Niranjana]

ok ok Niro please i am asking kindly that we shouldn't make this incident more perverse than it already is....and Nira i know you are fustrated but please don't use such words...i know you love your sis and can't stand someone who does such things to make her miserable...the main reason i say this to both of you is that to be fair (even if mil is wrong and your sis is not in this instance) we only know the story thru you that you heard from your sis...so not whole story from all sides...furthermore this is quickly turning to another issue altogether...all i can say is for your sister to confront and demand something to be done....besides that i can only say that your love for your sis will only make you more biased towards her mil and whatever her situation/reasons are...which will in turn only bring up the negative things you know about the mil....

(as an aside...from the families i know where mil is trouble causing ...it is not because it is her most beloved son she does this to rather it is the one who is not her favourite....is this just a representative sample i have encountered or do others' find this true as well)

Thankyou for the reply, Querida.

Even I think my sister is over dramatising the issues. She's such a pampered girl that she cannot adjust at all in another home.
She herself says that her mil makes her favourite dishes whenever she comes home etc.

But MIL interferes in Everything, which is irritating her. She is now very clear in her stand, she wants to move out to a new home or stay in our home. Not go back.

[Niranjana]

quote="blahblah"]Niranjana,from what you said:

1.I feel that your sister's husband is having some problem to father a child.
2.Your sister simply refuse to acknowedge facts.If someone takes you on so straight,what will you do?My answer is stand up and fight.After all is she benefittrd from a husband or mother in law like this?not at all!She has a life of her own and what I would say is the sooner she gets rid of them the better for her :? .[/quote]

Well, there's no question of a divorce as the two of them are very much in love. They can't be separated even for a day! lol! So sweet, na?

[viggop]

Dear Niranjana
Physical disability in having an offspring does not matter at all.You cannot do anything much about it except take medications.But ,that does not mean you can make fun of a person with such a disability whether it is the girl or the boy.If your sister is later proven to be medically incapable of producing a child,will you disown your sister? will you agree if anyone disowns your sister giving this reason.This logic applies to the boy too.If your bil is proven to impotent medically,that does not give you any superior position to talk anything you want about him.

People with mental disability are the ones who are bad and that can be corrected :D SInce,your sis and bil love each other so much,they should not let anyone/anything break their relationship.

Old people have to be given the feeling of importance.This itself will melt any heart made of stone.That you respect them a lot!
It is young people who should forgive mistakes of older ones and should not expect any apology from senior citizens.

[nirosha sen]

:D Well, here's to all's well that ends well, Pa!! Just hope, your sis is able to iron out the wrinkles of her discontentment soon!!

[Niranjana]

Sister hasn't gone back yet. There's so much tension in the hse.
No one is taking up the topic but it is always in the air. Bil came here for 2 days and went to office from our home. He's very CLEAR about not taking a new home.
I don't know what's going to happen! Good Lord!

[blahblah]

Sorry for asking this.But I can't help it.Are you sure that your sister is married to a 'man'? :roll: :roll:

[Roshan]

blablah,

I think there's two sides to this story. nira herself says that her sister is over dramatizing things :cry: Therefore I think the fault lies on both sides and the poor son/husband has become the scape goat and is in a mess now. :cry: :cry:

[Niranjana]

My father is planning to take my sister to a Psychiatrist, as she's feeling very depressed. She HATES the sight/sound of her mom-in-law. Good Lord!
I don't know why this is happening to my family!

[Niranjana]

Sorry for asking this.But I can't help it.Are you sure that your sister is married to a 'man'? :roll: :roll:

Well, I doubt that as much as you!

[nirosha sen]

Niranjana - Pl. check your messages, please.

[dev]

Well, I doubt that as much as you!

Is it right to make such a stmt against ur bil ,niranjana?... :shock: :?

[a.ratchasi]

This thread reminds me of a certain 'Dr' hubber.

[Roshan]

YEAH !!!! :wink:

[blahblah]

Uhm,something like that!!! :roll:

[Niranjana]

This thread reminds me of a certain 'Dr' hubber.

Doctor hubber? Sorry, I didn't get you.

[Niranjana]

Well, I doubt that as much as you!

Is it right to make such a stmt against ur bil ,niranjana?... :shock: :?

Well, at times, I get sooooo ANNOYED with the recent happenings

[Niranjana]

Niranjana - Pl. check your messages, please.

Yes, I will Niro

[dev]

Hmmm...Good that ur dad is taking her to a Psychiatrist... Hope they'll be able to help her out...

[mellon]

well, if I were a "teen-ager", I would not 'poke' my nose into my older sister "personal life". Because I would not know a damn about what married life is all about. 8)

Life is not as simple as you imagine! 8)

[Niranjana]

My sister & bil has settled their issues. She's gone back to her in law's home. She now feels more compassionate towards her mother-in-law, as the poor woman will die for her children & has nothing else in this world but her sons. Good Lord! Why didn't she realise this before?
But I think, it will still be good if she sees a psychiatrist.

Hope she has peace in life!

Thankyou everyone for your advice & support!

[king of chennai]

hey people, did u know that when u rearrange the letters of the word 'women Hitler' we get Mother in-law.no offence to all u mother in lwas out there.

[dev]

That's a great news Niranjana... :)

[Surya]

"I think you're friend is you." - Analyze this! Billy Crystal aka Dr. Ben Sobbel.

:lol2: Just kidding. Had to say that cause it reminded me of it.

Peace. 8)

[dev]

:D

[Niranjana]

"I think you're friend is you." - Analyze this! Billy Crystal aka Dr. Ben Sobbel.

:lol2: Just kidding. Had to say that cause it reminded me of it.

Peace. 8)

You're friend is you? sorry?

[Niranjana]

well, if I were a "teen-ager", I would not 'poke' my nose into my older sister "personal life". Because I would not know a damn about what married life is all about. 8)

Life is not as simple as you imagine! 8)

Well, I am not the one who poked my nose into her problems. She was the one who blurted it out infront of all.

[mellon]

My dear sister Niranjana,

The "take home lesson" for you is that make sure you marry a guy whose mom is dead already so that you dont have to kill his mom here in the forum just like you killed the other mil ! 8)

[Niranjana]

My dear sister Niranjana,

The "take home lesson" for you is that make sure you marry a guy whose mom is dead already so that you dont have to kill his mom here in the forum just like you killed the other mil ! 8)

LOL!!!!!!!!!! :lol:

[sonu gopi]

Her motherinlaw goes upstairs every now and then and once she peeped into the window while my sister & hubby were in bed! My sister hates to live there after this incident.

Oh! dear me...this is just like what a friend told me about her MIL..that she not only takes several peeps now and then but makes the maids to peep too and then give her the details! :evil:

Being the only son, her husband didn't want to say much to his widowed mother. She even instructed that the door should be left ajar at nights! This led to so many aruguments between this husband/wife team. :(

One fine day the husband just packed his clothes and left the house - of course taking his wife along!! As expected my friend was blamed for it. Its only after they moved out that they had their 2 beautiful children! :lol:

I do feel sorry for the MIL - she felt that she has lost her son's love and that its now taken over by another woman! But what she was doing to my friend was really unfair. Now they have patched up their differences - they do visit her quite often with their children - she is much nicer to them now as she has learnt her lesson the hard way! :(

*********
Sonu Gopi :P

[nirosha sen]

Glad to find a kindred spirit, Sonu!! :D

Yes, for if the problem described is really true, although I have absolutely no intention of impugning Niranjana's integrity, I really believe that peeping in on a couple when they are alone is nothing but sheer voyeurism, Pa!! And it is indeed sick!! :x

[mellon]

I see SICKNESS everywhere not just on the "accused" who may very well be "innocent". Well, it is indeed "too far" to measure someone's integrity from one's posts, at least to me. Unfortunately I dont have agony aunt's extraordinary skills or the tools for measuring anyone's integrity.

The way I look at this problem is:

This is a "nice way out" to get out of husband's home for "smart" "modern" "daughter-in-law" who does not care to live a with a "SICK SON" who was born for a "SICK MOTHER".

The smart daughter -in-law gets two mangoes using one stone.

I think such a SON will be SICK too since the morals the son has today are taught to him by his SICK MOTHER, "the accused mil". How would he ever become BETTER than his mom?? :roll:

Well, all MOTHERS are mothers-in-law to someone else. So we are not bringing down the MOTHERS-IN-LAW here but our OWN MOTHERS, the one who brought us to this SICK world where all the "daughters-in-law" are apparently INNOCENT until of course they become MOTHERS-IN-LAW to some other daughter-in-law.

[Badri]

Mellon: :thumbsup:

Good job in analyzing this objectively! I think we are all making two mistakes in our conclusions:

a) We believe that the original poster was 100 % right in their observations

b) We think therefore, that the mother-in-law is to be blamed.

Before we jump the gun, are we very sure that the whole thing was not imagined by Niranjana's sister? And I was rather surprised by the sudden U-turn she did too - all of a sudden, she began to feel compassionate towards the m-i-l!!! Something definitely fishy there!

In any case, before condemming to Universal damnation, all the mother in laws of the world, I think we have to consider the matter more maturely like mellon has done. We are all no doubt, disgusted by perversity in all its forms, but unless we are absolutely sure that the person in question has been proven perverse, it is ridiculous to pass judgements, as has been done in this post.

We can condemn voyuerism, but not the person unless we are acting on solid proof, not just the words of one hubber!

Thanks again, Mellon!

[a.ratchasi]

An apt analysis indeed. :thumbsup:

When I read the initial post, I saw it as just another MIL vs DIL issue which was heightened by the ever so subservient hubby who chooses to stay away from tackling issues head-on.

Though after reading the 'peeping' incident, I felt maybe, just maybe the DIL is a passive young lady who is suffering in silence. Thus, felt her parents should get involve to put a stop to this for once.

This, however, was not to be as I realised the many contradicting reactions by the 'vic'.

[hehehewalrus]

*wondering why an information thats HIGHLY personal to a family has been thoroughly spiced up and exploded so publicly by a WISE 17 year old who has put all her personal details, interests, hobbies, location on her profile*

Are the affected couple(and MIL) aware of this request for multi-national counselling?

Is the real world running short of counsellers?

hmmmmm :?

[Cindy]

This thread reminds me of a certain 'Dr' hubber.

Doctor hubber? Sorry, I didn't get you.

yea.. but we all got you!!!!!! :D

[Niranjana]

I see SICKNESS everywhere not just on the "accused" who may very well be "innocent". Well, it is indeed "too far" to measure someone's integrity from one's posts, at least to me. Unfortunately I dont have agony aunt's extraordinary skills or the tools for measuring anyone's integrity.

The way I look at this problem is:

This is a "nice way out" to get out of husband's home for "smart" "modern" "daughter-in-law" who does not care to live a with a "SICK SON" who was born for a "SICK MOTHER".

The smart daughter -in-law gets two mangoes using one stone.

I think such a SON will be SICK too since the morals the son has today are taught to him by his SICK MOTHER, "the accused mil". How would he ever become BETTER than his mom?? :roll:

Well, all MOTHERS are mothers-in-law to someone else. So we are not bringing down the MOTHERS-IN-LAW here but our OWN MOTHERS, the one who brought us to this SICK world where all the "daughters-in-law" are apparently INNOCENT until of course they become MOTHERS-IN-LAW to some other daughter-in-law.


Are you saying that the peeping was alright? Was that the best thing to be done by a mil?

[Niranjana]

Her motherinlaw goes upstairs every now and then and once she peeped into the window while my sister & hubby were in bed! My sister hates to live there after this incident.

Oh! dear me...this is just like what a friend told me about her MIL..that she not only takes several peeps now and then but makes the maids to peep too and then give her the details! :evil:

Being the only son, her husband didn't want to say much to his widowed mother. She even instructed that the door should be left ajar at nights! This led to so many aruguments between this husband/wife team. :(

One fine day the husband just packed his clothes and left the house - of course taking his wife along!! As expected my friend was blamed for it. Its only after they moved out that they had their 2 beautiful children! :lol:

I do feel sorry for the MIL - she felt that she has lost her son's love and that its now taken over by another woman! But what she was doing to my friend was really unfair. Now they have patched up their differences - they do visit her quite often with their children - she is much nicer to them now as she has learnt her lesson the hard way! :(

*********
Sonu Gopi :P


If only my sister was as lucky as your friend! Sigh!

Now I know why she's not conceiving, though her medical tests are normal. She's definitely under stress. I have read that stress could be one of the factors that cause infertility.

[mellon]

Dont you UNDERSTAND English, Ms. Niranjana?????????? :roll:

I posted "my post" for few select individuals who can look at the problem in a different angle. It is DEFINITELY not for you, N, sorry!

And dont you ever "misquote' my posts. You better understand that. Because you are INSULTING me by phrasing "your question" in an UGLY MANNER.

If you want to talk about "peeping" start another thread and get some "sick people" to discuss that with you in the 'public forum'. Not here in m-i-l thread!!!

-------------------------------------------------------

A mother should throw her son out of her home when he reaches 18 just before the colllege education. That idiot should go on his own and should finish his college education with his own earnings. Then he can choose any bimbo he wants marry and live whatever life he wants on his own.

The mother and her betterhalf, the father, should save the money they make for their future, may be to take care of themselves after their retirement. That will help them living a decent life instead of bringing up wotrthless trashes using that money and get insultd by some trashes later.

A "stupid mother" usually brings up her son and spend all their money for his education and what not. Then she gets insulted by some trashes as a compliment for her dedication and the love she had for her son.

Because she realises her mistake only after a long time!

Enjoy the song!

sonthamenRu vanthathellAm sonthamum illai
oru thunai illaamal vanthavanum baaramum illai

nanRiyuLLa uyirkalellAm piLLai thaanadaa
thambi, nanRi ketta maganai vida naaygaL mEladA, naaygaL mEladA

[Cygnus]

A mother should throw her son out of her home when he reaches 18 just before the colllege education. That idiot should go on his own and should finish his college education with his own earnings. Then he can choose any bimbo he wants marry and live whatever life he wants on his own.

The mother and her betterhalf, the father, should save the money they make for their future, may be to take care of themselves after their retirement. That will help them living a decent life instead of bringing up wotrthless trashes using that money and get insultd by some trashes later.

A "stupid mother" usually brings up her son and spend all their money for his education and what not. Then she gets insulted by some trashes as a compliment for her dedication and the love she had for her son.

Because she realises her mistake only after a long time!

Enjoy the song!

sonthamenRu vanthathellAm sonthamum illai
oru thunai illaamal vanthavanum baaramum illai

nanRiyuLLa uyirkalellAm piLLai thaanadaa
thambi, nanRi ketta maganai vida naaygaL mEladA, naaygaL mEladA

:clap: :clap: :thumbsup: :clap: :clap:

ponnezuthuthukkaLil poRikkappadavENdiya vArththaigaL mellon!!!!!

[mellon]

puththaaNdu vaazhthukkaL, Cygnus! :)