Terry Cummings
22nd March 2005, 07:09 PM
He saw the darkness falling away from the sky and a soft warm, orange light bled slowly into the room, staining cold white walls and creeping across the tiled floor toward his feet. The windows, through which the light now poured, were small and set high, almost to the ceiling.
He had sat awake most of the night, hungry and regretting his attempt to attack his jailer. The bland stinking food he had been offered then, seemed like a feast right now. Perhaps he had been hasty.
There were three others like him in the room, and one who was female. She was wonderful to look at. She stared at him from across the room, head lolling to one side every time he grunted at her to attract her attention. She held his eyes for long moments, letting him know that she had noticed him too. She seemed a little sad and had lost some of the fur on her stomach, there was pain there, hidden in her eyes. She was young and seemed to have led a healthy life, her skin and fur sat perfectly about her frame. Despite this she seemed tired. He had not slept much last night and instead had watched her in the gloom, breathing in and out, sleeping fitfully. She was awake now and she grunted at him, letting him know she was still tired.
He had spent the first few hours of the darkness wondering why his tall ones had brought him here. They had seemed very affectionate when they left, so he was sure that he had not done anything to upset them, at least not recently. The stranger with the white coat had coaxed him into the cage with sweets. He had stroked and patted him and had rubbed his ear. When the door began to swing shut, he had forced his way back out. His tall ones had disappeared and the friendly white coat, who was not so friendly any more, pushed him back roughly. There had been a struggle. As he rubbed his wet paw over his muzzle and face, he found with disappointment that the blood that he had scented spilt had been his own. There was a small cut below his right eye, which he had cleaned enough to stop bleeding now. White coat had returned much later with the offering of food and he had tried to exact revenge but it had been in vain. The tall one had anticipated his attack and was prepared. He had opened only a small section of the cage before him, a gap not big enough for him to squeeze through. Instead he had felt the door swinging quickly closed again, squeezing his thrashing head back inside, his teeth finding purchase only against hard metal.
So he had sat and waited for something to happen. Many of the animals around him seemed strangely quiet. The others of his kind, other than the female, didn’t seem very respondent. A small white long-haired dog had yelped a greeting, back when he had been brought in, but in hindsight it may have been a warning against exhibiting the fury he had shown when he first arrived, a warning to calm down. In all the commotion, he may have misheard, there had been many voices in that moment. The small one had kept quiet ever since. An old overweight shaggy dog had grinned at him earlier. He could only be seen through four other cages to his right. But even from a distance, just by looking into his eyes, he could see that he was dying. There was a dryness about him which had affected the shine of his coat, the sparkle of his eyes, the moist sheen of his nose and lips. It was also there in the soft gruffs he gave. It seemed that this old one had trouble sleeping also and had stayed awake through the night. They had shared a little of their frustration, anger and resentment at the tall ones. They expressed to one another a growing unease and a longing to escape. Unfortunately they found no way of expressing how they could go about achieving this, so they had sat in silence for long periods of sad reflection. It appeared that the old one knew he was dying and that he had known for some time. There was a melancholy in his tone which told of the way in which he had been slowly worn down. There was no anger there though. He had been treated well, had been granted a contented life. There was little regret.
The morning sun had brought life with it and all about him in the room, the other creatures were stirring. Now for the first time, he became aware of the large bird in the corner of the room high above his shoulder. It was in a cage suspended from the ceiling. It had been very quiet up until now and its scent had been hidden by the overpowering mix of odours from the other creatures in the room and the unnatural scents covering the cages, spread across the floors and walls. The shrillness of the birds voice drove all tiredness from his mind. When the female had woken, she had let him know that she was feeling stronger. Apparently she had been sick, but was now recovering. She was afraid but she seemed reluctant to show her fear. He waited patiently as she stirred and yawned and stretched. He made sure that he sat proudly within the jail imposed upon him. He was dog, and with that, he was strong. He could still attract a female. It would take a lot more than being caged up here to drive down his spirits. It was with new-found confidence that he had expressed his anger at the man who now entered the room. The tall-one walked over to the cage of the old dog and opened it gently. He lifted the dog into his arms and hugged him against his chest, closing the door to the cage and walking back toward the door through which he had come.
It was only minutes before they heard the strange noises, alien, yet familiar, coming from another room close by. The sounds were from the throat of the old one, but he was crying louder than he had before, and louder than had seemed possible. There was alarm in his distant voice and then the lingering howls of pain.
He pushed against the walls to his cage and was rewarded with nothing. He pushed harder, thrusting at the door that he had been pushed through when he arrived. Nothing. The cries from the other room were getting louder and drove him to near-frenzied desperation. The tall ones were hurting his friend and there was nothing he could do to stop it. He bent his spine sideways to allow him to circle the cage. He bent almost in half, eyes scouring the wire all around him. There was no escape. None at all. He bit at the cage, tried to jump.
And then all went silent. The old ones last cries rang through the air and suddenly they were only echoes and then memories. He raised his ears to catch any other sound, but nothing came.
The tall ones had made the old dog suffer and had now quieted him. There was something dreadfully wrong, and he was not about to dismiss it lightly. He would call loud to the tall ones and repeat his call until he was answered. He would see what they had done by the look in their eyes.
As he howled, the other animals became agitated and the noise within the room rose to a crescendo until his voice was almost drowned out. He carried on and on all the same, crying out with all his strength and breath whilst around him cats mewled, birds shrieked and somewhere out of sight a monkey wailed with displeasure.
The door opened again as it had done before. The tall one with the dark jacket came straight for him and it seemed their eyes met and somehow they communicated. He stopped his howls, wagged his tail and panted, pricking up his ears the way that tall ones often found so pleasurable. He would lick the hands that came through his cage and be calm until he was through the door, then he would turn on his captor and escape to find the old one. It was a simple plan which seemed as though it may work as the door was opened, but the plan hadn’t featured the sheet which was thrown over his body. He squirmed inside and found himself smothered, unable to move his limbs or mouth. He was picked up and carried and then found himself scrabbling on a hard flat surface, which smelt strongly like the floor of the room and the cages. The sheet was removed and he saw he was in a smaller room with two tall ones, dark coat and now white coat. They seemed to be talking to one another, white coat issuing instructions to dark coat who seemed obedient. He wished so much that his tall ones were here now. He would forgive them for the punishments, for the dull life they had made him lead. He would allow them to take him home now with a chain around his neck and he would sit happily in the living room dreaming his dreams as the tall ones slept with their eyes open, watching the strange flashing box in the corner of the room, ignoring him. Dark coat held him down hard, pinning his shoulders to the table. The white coat returned with a needle. He had seen them before, he remembered the pain they brought which was so slow to die away. He had never understood why his tall ones had made him endure this, it had to be a punishment for sure, but it seemed like such a long way to come for simple punishment. Caged in the back of the car for hours. They were always so nice to him afterwards though, showering him with gifts and treats, hoping to win back his affections. It would not be so easy this time though, he planned to sulk for weeks over this. He would make them feel guilty for scaring him so badly. His treatment had been rough, and to leave him in the hands of these strangers to administer more was almost unforgivable. Almost. Maybe the treats and petting would be greater this time than ever before. Maybe the young female would come back home with him and he would run with her along pathways in the morning, feeling the fresh dew cooling his feet as he ran.
The pain as the needle went in was excruciating. He had never had it as bad as this in the past. The pain spread through his body and grew worse and worse. It was beyond his endurance and he felt his bladder failing on him, the warm liquid running through his fur. Worse and worse. He whimpered like a puppy. He fought the pain and failed. He fought again in desperation and failed. His shoulders were pinned down by a weight far greater than the hands of the dark coat. He moved his head slowly from side to side, looking for escape from the pain. The dark coat had moved away and was now leaving the room. The white coat had his back to him, if he could only move he could flee, but there was no movement left in him. He whispered to the tall one to help him but was given no response. He begged as he had never begged before. The pain ran through him like fire and glass and he could feel every part of his body tremble and spasm. His heart beat louder and louder in his ears. He tried to cry out loud to the tall one, to scream for help, but no voice left his lips. Every sound was lost to the deafening thuds of his pounding heart.
He wished he knew why they had done this to him.
Far beyond the point of his endurance, in an eternity of burning desperation, he felt himself wishing he could fall away into the dreams he had loved so much. As these thoughts filled his mind, of drifting toward the soft place he knew so well, curled beside the fireplace, listening absently to wood crackle and pop, something told him he could escape simply by surrendering to the pain, so he relaxed. The screaming of his heart gradually faded and the pain ebbed away until it was no more. As though it had never existed.
It seemed he had learned to sleep with his eyes open. He was leaden with sleep, his tongue laying motionless on the table, his vision was fixed on the wall before him. His eyes felt dry and he tried to blink. Nothing happened and he remembered that he was asleep. The tall one bent low to look at him, to look straight into his eyes. He moved away, vanishing from sight. His eyes could not follow but he could still see the wall, the chair, the table, his nose. In sleep he could still see and he wondered why it felt so unnatural. He felt pity for the tall ones who had done this to him.
The white coat returned and he could see him push wetness out of another sharp needle. He flicked it with a finger-nail and leant forward. When he returned the tall one was smiling and seemed to be reaching down to stroke the fur on his head, but he couldn’t feel it.
The wall became hazy, his nose seemed far away now, the white coat blurred away into nothingness.
He slowly closed his eyes.
He would not open them again.
He had sat awake most of the night, hungry and regretting his attempt to attack his jailer. The bland stinking food he had been offered then, seemed like a feast right now. Perhaps he had been hasty.
There were three others like him in the room, and one who was female. She was wonderful to look at. She stared at him from across the room, head lolling to one side every time he grunted at her to attract her attention. She held his eyes for long moments, letting him know that she had noticed him too. She seemed a little sad and had lost some of the fur on her stomach, there was pain there, hidden in her eyes. She was young and seemed to have led a healthy life, her skin and fur sat perfectly about her frame. Despite this she seemed tired. He had not slept much last night and instead had watched her in the gloom, breathing in and out, sleeping fitfully. She was awake now and she grunted at him, letting him know she was still tired.
He had spent the first few hours of the darkness wondering why his tall ones had brought him here. They had seemed very affectionate when they left, so he was sure that he had not done anything to upset them, at least not recently. The stranger with the white coat had coaxed him into the cage with sweets. He had stroked and patted him and had rubbed his ear. When the door began to swing shut, he had forced his way back out. His tall ones had disappeared and the friendly white coat, who was not so friendly any more, pushed him back roughly. There had been a struggle. As he rubbed his wet paw over his muzzle and face, he found with disappointment that the blood that he had scented spilt had been his own. There was a small cut below his right eye, which he had cleaned enough to stop bleeding now. White coat had returned much later with the offering of food and he had tried to exact revenge but it had been in vain. The tall one had anticipated his attack and was prepared. He had opened only a small section of the cage before him, a gap not big enough for him to squeeze through. Instead he had felt the door swinging quickly closed again, squeezing his thrashing head back inside, his teeth finding purchase only against hard metal.
So he had sat and waited for something to happen. Many of the animals around him seemed strangely quiet. The others of his kind, other than the female, didn’t seem very respondent. A small white long-haired dog had yelped a greeting, back when he had been brought in, but in hindsight it may have been a warning against exhibiting the fury he had shown when he first arrived, a warning to calm down. In all the commotion, he may have misheard, there had been many voices in that moment. The small one had kept quiet ever since. An old overweight shaggy dog had grinned at him earlier. He could only be seen through four other cages to his right. But even from a distance, just by looking into his eyes, he could see that he was dying. There was a dryness about him which had affected the shine of his coat, the sparkle of his eyes, the moist sheen of his nose and lips. It was also there in the soft gruffs he gave. It seemed that this old one had trouble sleeping also and had stayed awake through the night. They had shared a little of their frustration, anger and resentment at the tall ones. They expressed to one another a growing unease and a longing to escape. Unfortunately they found no way of expressing how they could go about achieving this, so they had sat in silence for long periods of sad reflection. It appeared that the old one knew he was dying and that he had known for some time. There was a melancholy in his tone which told of the way in which he had been slowly worn down. There was no anger there though. He had been treated well, had been granted a contented life. There was little regret.
The morning sun had brought life with it and all about him in the room, the other creatures were stirring. Now for the first time, he became aware of the large bird in the corner of the room high above his shoulder. It was in a cage suspended from the ceiling. It had been very quiet up until now and its scent had been hidden by the overpowering mix of odours from the other creatures in the room and the unnatural scents covering the cages, spread across the floors and walls. The shrillness of the birds voice drove all tiredness from his mind. When the female had woken, she had let him know that she was feeling stronger. Apparently she had been sick, but was now recovering. She was afraid but she seemed reluctant to show her fear. He waited patiently as she stirred and yawned and stretched. He made sure that he sat proudly within the jail imposed upon him. He was dog, and with that, he was strong. He could still attract a female. It would take a lot more than being caged up here to drive down his spirits. It was with new-found confidence that he had expressed his anger at the man who now entered the room. The tall-one walked over to the cage of the old dog and opened it gently. He lifted the dog into his arms and hugged him against his chest, closing the door to the cage and walking back toward the door through which he had come.
It was only minutes before they heard the strange noises, alien, yet familiar, coming from another room close by. The sounds were from the throat of the old one, but he was crying louder than he had before, and louder than had seemed possible. There was alarm in his distant voice and then the lingering howls of pain.
He pushed against the walls to his cage and was rewarded with nothing. He pushed harder, thrusting at the door that he had been pushed through when he arrived. Nothing. The cries from the other room were getting louder and drove him to near-frenzied desperation. The tall ones were hurting his friend and there was nothing he could do to stop it. He bent his spine sideways to allow him to circle the cage. He bent almost in half, eyes scouring the wire all around him. There was no escape. None at all. He bit at the cage, tried to jump.
And then all went silent. The old ones last cries rang through the air and suddenly they were only echoes and then memories. He raised his ears to catch any other sound, but nothing came.
The tall ones had made the old dog suffer and had now quieted him. There was something dreadfully wrong, and he was not about to dismiss it lightly. He would call loud to the tall ones and repeat his call until he was answered. He would see what they had done by the look in their eyes.
As he howled, the other animals became agitated and the noise within the room rose to a crescendo until his voice was almost drowned out. He carried on and on all the same, crying out with all his strength and breath whilst around him cats mewled, birds shrieked and somewhere out of sight a monkey wailed with displeasure.
The door opened again as it had done before. The tall one with the dark jacket came straight for him and it seemed their eyes met and somehow they communicated. He stopped his howls, wagged his tail and panted, pricking up his ears the way that tall ones often found so pleasurable. He would lick the hands that came through his cage and be calm until he was through the door, then he would turn on his captor and escape to find the old one. It was a simple plan which seemed as though it may work as the door was opened, but the plan hadn’t featured the sheet which was thrown over his body. He squirmed inside and found himself smothered, unable to move his limbs or mouth. He was picked up and carried and then found himself scrabbling on a hard flat surface, which smelt strongly like the floor of the room and the cages. The sheet was removed and he saw he was in a smaller room with two tall ones, dark coat and now white coat. They seemed to be talking to one another, white coat issuing instructions to dark coat who seemed obedient. He wished so much that his tall ones were here now. He would forgive them for the punishments, for the dull life they had made him lead. He would allow them to take him home now with a chain around his neck and he would sit happily in the living room dreaming his dreams as the tall ones slept with their eyes open, watching the strange flashing box in the corner of the room, ignoring him. Dark coat held him down hard, pinning his shoulders to the table. The white coat returned with a needle. He had seen them before, he remembered the pain they brought which was so slow to die away. He had never understood why his tall ones had made him endure this, it had to be a punishment for sure, but it seemed like such a long way to come for simple punishment. Caged in the back of the car for hours. They were always so nice to him afterwards though, showering him with gifts and treats, hoping to win back his affections. It would not be so easy this time though, he planned to sulk for weeks over this. He would make them feel guilty for scaring him so badly. His treatment had been rough, and to leave him in the hands of these strangers to administer more was almost unforgivable. Almost. Maybe the treats and petting would be greater this time than ever before. Maybe the young female would come back home with him and he would run with her along pathways in the morning, feeling the fresh dew cooling his feet as he ran.
The pain as the needle went in was excruciating. He had never had it as bad as this in the past. The pain spread through his body and grew worse and worse. It was beyond his endurance and he felt his bladder failing on him, the warm liquid running through his fur. Worse and worse. He whimpered like a puppy. He fought the pain and failed. He fought again in desperation and failed. His shoulders were pinned down by a weight far greater than the hands of the dark coat. He moved his head slowly from side to side, looking for escape from the pain. The dark coat had moved away and was now leaving the room. The white coat had his back to him, if he could only move he could flee, but there was no movement left in him. He whispered to the tall one to help him but was given no response. He begged as he had never begged before. The pain ran through him like fire and glass and he could feel every part of his body tremble and spasm. His heart beat louder and louder in his ears. He tried to cry out loud to the tall one, to scream for help, but no voice left his lips. Every sound was lost to the deafening thuds of his pounding heart.
He wished he knew why they had done this to him.
Far beyond the point of his endurance, in an eternity of burning desperation, he felt himself wishing he could fall away into the dreams he had loved so much. As these thoughts filled his mind, of drifting toward the soft place he knew so well, curled beside the fireplace, listening absently to wood crackle and pop, something told him he could escape simply by surrendering to the pain, so he relaxed. The screaming of his heart gradually faded and the pain ebbed away until it was no more. As though it had never existed.
It seemed he had learned to sleep with his eyes open. He was leaden with sleep, his tongue laying motionless on the table, his vision was fixed on the wall before him. His eyes felt dry and he tried to blink. Nothing happened and he remembered that he was asleep. The tall one bent low to look at him, to look straight into his eyes. He moved away, vanishing from sight. His eyes could not follow but he could still see the wall, the chair, the table, his nose. In sleep he could still see and he wondered why it felt so unnatural. He felt pity for the tall ones who had done this to him.
The white coat returned and he could see him push wetness out of another sharp needle. He flicked it with a finger-nail and leant forward. When he returned the tall one was smiling and seemed to be reaching down to stroke the fur on his head, but he couldn’t feel it.
The wall became hazy, his nose seemed far away now, the white coat blurred away into nothingness.
He slowly closed his eyes.
He would not open them again.